Need You Now
by Malfoy Mouth James- MMJ
Summary: The 73rd Hunger Games were cold, depressing, and soul-killing. Almost exactly the same as the ones before it. Aces Smith faces her demons as well as everyone else's to get back home. Gale/OC. I own nothing you know. The story is better, I promise.
1. Chapter 1

Shout out to my best friend for the awesome title! 

Author's Note: Both Aces and Gale are seventeen and Katniss is fifteen, Posy is fourteen. Prim is eleven, and Vick is four. Also, Rooba is merchant for this story, just cause it works better.

* * *

I wipe my hands carefully on the towel that hangs off the edge of the counter. It may be reaping day, but the butcher's shop is never closed. We're even open on Christmas.

We're the only ones who are open on Christmas.

Grandma Rooba says it's for the best, so that we can have as much money as we can, so that we never have to starve like the Seam children.

I wish they didn't have to starve.

I quite like them.

No one else does, really. I'm the only merchant, no, scrap that. Peeta Mellark, a small acquaintance of mine, is in love with a Seam girl. I guess that's what makes us _almost_ friends.

Because I'm in love with a Seam boy.

"Aces! Why aren't you dress yet? It's almost one!" Grandma says, coming into the back of the shop where we cut the meat. I look down at my bloody apron before looking back up at her. We look a lot alike, both with green eyes and pale skin littered with freckles. I'm shorter than her, around five three. The biggest difference, however, is our hair.

Hers is golden blonde, like my mother's. Mine is a flaming red, like my father's.

Mother died during childbirth, something I'll always carry with me. Soon after, maybe four-six months, Father went out into the surrounding woods and never came back. I've been here with Grandma Rooba ever since.

My father's family was the only family in all of Twelve who ever had red hair. No one knows where it came from, but people think it could be from District Five, they have lots of red haired people there.

"Sorry, Grandma. I'll go get ready." I say, setting down the carving knife.

She nods as I rush by, "Quickly now!" She yells over her shoulder.

I'm up the stairs in a matter of seconds, grabbing my green reaping dress in another five. A minute later and I'm standing in a freezing cold shower, shivering but washing the grime from my hair nonetheless.

After my shower I quickly slip into my dress and pin back my infuriating red curls with little gold ribbons. I laced up my gold gladiator sandals and brushed my teeth before running down the stairs.

Grandma merely looks at me before wrapping me in her arms, the only place I've ever felt safe.

"Here. You should take this. For… For good luck." She says, handing me something. I open my hand and in my palm lies a small gold and silver ring.

"It was your mother's. And, well. She'd want you to have it. And, in case… you can have a token." She doesn't have to elaborate, we both know she means if I'm reaped.

I don't want to be reaped. I don't want to die.

I don't want to kill.

We walk together towards the square, hand in hand. I watch as all the children from ages twelve to eighteen line up to be checked in before scurrying to their places in roped off areas.

I sigh and hug my grandmother once more, before lining up myself. I barely notice when they prick my finger. Fear courses through my veins, numbing me to everything else in the world. I stumble to the section for seventeen year old girls, and wait for it to begin.

I watch, in slight disgust, as Effie Trinket takes the stage.

She taps the microphone a few times.

"Welcome, ladies and gentlemen! To the 73rd Hunger Games! Now, give your polite attention to your Mayor as he reads the treaty of treason!" She says, motioning to Mayor Undersee. He stands up and reads from a scroll of paper into the microphone as he has for the past umpteen years.

"Wonderful, amazing! Ladies first!" She quips, practically skipping over to a glass bowl. I draw in a deep breath, not daring to let it go until I hear the name. I pray and pray that it won't be my name, that I won't have to die.

"Posy Hawthorne!" The evil purple marshmallow yells out. I feel my face drain slightly, and my fingers and toes go cold.

Oh no. Not her. Please.

I watch slowly as the fourteen year old walks slowly, shaking in her little black flats, towards the stage. She climbs the stairs and stands next to Effie.

"Wonderful! Now, for our boy tribute!" She practically squeal as she slowly allows her fingers to sift through the slips.

I can't even pray for him to not be picked, I still haven't caught my breath from when Posy was reaped.

"Sam Nightingale!" She calls. The name is semi familiar, he's merchant. In my class, actually. But it doesn't matter.

He has to die.

"Any volunteers?" Effie asks.

She counts down.

Five.

 _Too young._

Four.

 _What will Gale do?_

Three.

 _I can't just stand here!_

Two.

And then I remember the rule.

"O-" she begins but I shoe my way out into the aisle.

"I VOLUNTEER!" The harsh and quivering voice that rips forth sounds nothing like me, and for a second I think it's not me who's said it. But then Peacekeepers are dragging me up the stairs and a frightened Posy down them. As I pass her she looks at me, into my soul.

"Thank you." She says, her bottom lip quivering with un-shed tears. I can't even make myself nod at her in return.

I guess I really will needed that token, after all.

"Awe, how sweet! Your name, deary?" She asks. I swallow thickly, and I wonder if everyone could hear it.

"Aces Smith." I say, and fear I may break into tears.

Maybe it would help me. Johanna Mason did it a few years back, she tricked everyone into thinking that she was weak and no one bothered to even look for her. She won that year.

I decided this will be my strategy as they lead us into rooms where we can say goodbye.

I'm not surprised when Grandma walks in.

She immediately wraps me in another embrace.

"You must come back, Aces. You're all I have. You are strong, you know how to use axes, and cleavers, and knives. You can win." She says, her voice strong. She holds me at arm's length and tucks a stray tendril of hair behind my ear.

"Promise you'll try? For me?" She asks, and I see the fear in her emerald green eyes.

"Of course." I choke out, and then they're back, taking her away, and I'm yelling to her.

"I love you! I'll win! I will! I'll be back!" And then the doors slam shut.

I collapse into the soft couch behind me, and cover my face with my hands.

I am surprised, however, when the door opens again and I'm suddenly being attacked by a small thing. I emit a small 'Eep!' as her arms clasp around me; her stick thin arms.

"Oh thank you!" She sobs uncontrollably, and I know now that there's no way I'm leaving this building without tears on my face.

My eyes well up and I hug her back.

"You're welcome, Posy." I say, smoothing down her sweaty black hair.

That's when I notice him standing in the doorway.

Gale.

"Why did you do it?" He asks as Posy let's go and stands by her older brother. I shrug.

"Because I didn't want to watch a small, innocent girl go in there. I can't do it anymore. It's… it's sick." I mutter, frowning at the floor.

He frowns as well, in confusion.

"Well, thank you." He grunts, clearly uncomfortable.

"Don't mention it."

"You just saved my sister's life. I have to mention it. I can't even repay you." He gripes.

"I don't care. I didn't volunteer for a reward." I say, wishing I was able to be a little more upset or angry with this boy.

It was hard to hate him.

He took Posy's hand and left.

And then I'm alone until they come and walk me towards the car. I force myself to cry, and once the tears start the sobs follow: huge, ugly sobs, wracking my whole body. I am forced into the black limousine, and we drive to the platform. I've never been in a car before, or on a train.

I'm still sobbing pitifully when I get out of the car and stand in the door of the train, waiting as they take more pictures before the doors close.

Sealing my fate.


	2. Chapter 2

Author's Note: Both Aces and Gale are seventeen and Katniss is fifteen, Posy is fourteen. Prim is eleven, and Vick is four. Also, Rooba is merchant for this story, just cause it works better.

* * *

I sit quietly at the table, pushing the food around my plate. I knew he hated me, like he hated every other merchant, but I didn't think he hated me that much.

I look over at Sam who is eating like a… well, a starving child.

Haymitch stumbles in and I straighten up. He may be shit-faced drunk, but he did win this once.

A long time ago.

When he was young and kind of fit.

And not poisoned by alcohol.

Oh well.

"Ah, the new tributes. Welcome to one of the last rooms you'll ever see." He says, dropping into the chair across from me.

"You seem very certain that both of us are going to die." I say, my voice emotionless.

"That's because you always do. You, sweetheart, will die in the blood bath. This boy here, well, he won't make it past the third day." He gripes. I raise an eyebrow at him and cross my arms.

"I'm insulted." I say.

He scoffs, "Don't take it personally, you're a merchant. Both of you are. You may be more well fed but you know nothing of surviving."

I look at him in disbelief.

"I cut up and skin animals for a living."

"Oh, you're Rooba's granddaughter! Thought you looked familiar…" I roll my eyes again. Who knew I had so much sass in me?

"Yeah. I'm pretty handy with a knife. Now, what can you tell us that will help us?" I ask. I can't bring myself to say 'tell _me_ ', or 'help _me_.'

"Hmm. Don't draw attention. Don't die." I blink once. Twice. Three times and I realize he's dead serious.

That's not the best thing to say right now, actually.

"Oh really? I would have never thought. My plan was to run in there screaming and crying and tell them to come kill me and wait as they slit my throat." Haymitch looks at me for a moment.

"The crying might not be a bad idea, actually. You definitely could pull off a Mason."

So he thinks so too. I simply nod and return my attention to the food, eating something finally.

We gather in a living room type area to watch the Reapings. The tributes from District One are both blonde, as usual. They are both buff as well. Go figure.

District Two has a small brunette boy and a tall, scary girl with dark black hair. It goes on and on, and then there's my district. Posy walking up. Sam walking up.

Me volunteering.

"Alright then! Everyone off to bed! We have a very exciting day tomorrow!" Effie squeals, shooing is off to our respective rooms.

I change out of my dress into a cream colored top and some pj shorts. I lay under the covers and twist my mother's ring around my finger, wondering what she would say if she were here right now.

I don't sleep very well that night.

* * *

I wake up early, at six o'clock like I do every day to open up the shop. Except I'm not opening a shop today. Today I'll be entering the Capitol, where I may never exit.

I shower and put my hair in a long twist that hangs down my back before pulling on a beige shirt and dark blue cappreese.

Besides Effie, I'm the first one to breakfast.

"Oh! You're awake! How wonderful to finally have a tribute wake up on their own!" She sighs, smiling brightly at me. She's no longer the evil purple marshmallow, but a misinformed orange stick.

Odd.

I sit down across from her and begin to eat. The food here is delicious, rich in many different spices and covered in a surplus of sauces and creams.

I dig in like I wish I had last night, and before long I'm stuffed. I'm just polishing off my second plate when Haymitch stumbles in with Sam not too far behind.

"We'll be in the Capitol soon!" Effie says, urging the boys to 'eat faster!'

I'm quiet through all of breakfast, and I try to get my eyes to water again as we come to a stop.

By the time I'm on camera I have tears slowly trickling down my cheeks, my eyes trained on my feet as I trip over them to get into the remake center.

I've played my part well so far. I just have to keep it up a little longer, and then maybe, just maybe, I can actually win this and go home.

Go home to Grandma.

And Gale.

Even if he doesn't want me.

I allow the extravagant Capitol stylists to strip me of my arm and leg hair, trim my eyebrows and bangs, and wash the grime off of me that I could never have done with the filmy soap we buy at home.

I'm squeaky clean by the time a woman walks in, covered in purple and blue swirls. I resist the urge to scrunch my nose in disgust.

She sighs and walks around me, studying my body.

"Well, you aren't very pretty, and your hair is less than desirable, but I think we can make it work. I'm Janette, your stylist. Perhaps, we could… Hmm… oh! I know!" She says, grabbing some canisters from a cabinet. She opens them and a strong chemical smell hits my nose.

"Excuse me, but what exactly is that?" I ask.

"Nothing to worry about dear. It will make your hair sparkle!"

Oh Good Lord. Help. Please?

The crazy woman dies strands of my hair different colors of gold and orange and even some light yellow till my hair seems to be on fire. It blends nicely with my red curls, and I'm surprised by how… nice it actually looks. Odd, of course, but… pretty.

"There! Now, put on this and then we can paint your face and you'll be the perfect little piece of coal!" Janette says, handing me a grey dress with long sleeves and black swirls all over it. It trails a bit behind me, and I quickly slip into it. She comes back with some black paint and smears it under my eyes, swirls it on my hands and cheeks, and dots it around the edge of my face. I look in the mirror and she's right.

I'm the perfect little piece of coal.


	3. Chapter 3

Author's Note: Both Aces and Gale are seventeen and Katniss is fifteen, Posy is fourteen. Prim is eleven, and Vick is four. Also, Rooba is merchant for this story, just cause it works better.

* * *

I wait by the chariot and Haymitch comes out soon with Sam next to him. He's wearing a grey suit designed like mine, and he has red streaks in his golden merchant hair.

"Your hair looks… nice." He says awkwardly. I attempt to smile, but it just turns into a grimace.

"Thanks. Yours too."

And that's the end of our conversation. Haymitch helps me up into the chariot and Sam climbs up next, and we wait for it to start moving.

District four is already going out, decked in blues and greens. It won't be too much longer now.

I try to think of what to do. I won't cry this time, I would ruin the paint.

I'm still contemplating this when the horse jerks forward, and I clutch onto Sam's arm to keep from falling off. He steadies me, but doesn't remove my arm. I look up, blinded by the sun, and then deafened by yells.

"Aces! Aces!" They chant, and when my eyes catch the big screens, I see why.

With my red hair highlighted with the colors of flames, it really did look like I was a piece of coal on fire. My hair was down and blowing furiously in the wind behind me.

I also realize that with me clutching tightly to my district partner it makes me look small and weak and young. And innocent.

And not a threat.

Therefore, not a target.

So I don't let go.

About halfway down the runway though, I smile timidly at the crowd and raise my other hand, waving tentatively.

The crowd goes wild.

I wave more. Smile more innocently. More like a child. And then I let go of Sam's arm and blow kisses out to all the odd people on either side of me, waving my hands at everyone I can, even catching a couple roses here and there.

As our chariot pulls to a stop and put a small yellow daisy behind my ear, the color standing out nicely with my hair.

Snow addresses the people of Panem. The tributes. The crowd of Capitalites. And then it's over and we are walking inside.

And all I can think is, I can't wait to go to bed.

* * *

I wake up to the sun shining brightly through the curtains. I slept much better last night than the night before. Don't ask me why, I don't know.

I turn over and look at the little digital clock on the table beside my bed.

It's 6:38. I sigh and sit up, feeling as my hair frizzed out and made a red halo behind me. I grabbed some new clothes and walked into the bathroom to take a shower.

I scrubbed my hair for somewhere around ten minutes, but the colors wouldn't come out.

Oh God.

Is this permanent?!

I give up after a few more handfuls of shampoo and move on to washing my face and everything else.

I dry off quickly, it's cold in the bathroom, and pull on the training outfit that was left out for me. It's tight, almost like a unitard but in two pieces. The shorts go down to about mid thigh and the sleeves are short, they don't make it too far over my shoulder.

This time Haymitch is at the table already too.

"Good morning, Scarlet." Haymitch said, taking a drink from his flask. I frown and sit down at the table.

"What?"

"Scarlet. Your new nickname, kid."

I scoff, "I think I like 'kid' better." I say, rolling my eyes and piling food on my plate.

"Too bad. Now, you got any useful talents?" He asks.

I shrugged, "I mean, I guess I'm not too bad with a knife, but I usually only used cleavers, so…" Haymitch nods.

"Here," he says, handing me a knife. "Throw this, I want to see what "not too bad" is." I take the knife carefully. It's small, lightweight. Butter knife.

I've never actually used one of these before, so the weight is a little off throwing, but I throw it anyways.

I aim at the pear in a fruit bowl across the dining room, and it sticks right in the middle.

I turn back to Haymitch, who looks slightly impressed. Effie looks very disappointed in us. Then Sam comes in.

"Good, what's your skills?" Haymitch says, getting right down to business.

"Uh… I work at the tailors. I don't really have any skills…" he says awkwardly. Haymitch frowns.

"Okay, I take back my statement from the other day. You won't make it past day two."

I roll my eyes again and rip off a piece of bread, dipping it in the hot chocolate in front of me. I've only had it once before, Grandma got a little for my ninth birthday. It's probably my favorite thing in the world.

"Training starts today. Sam, I want you trying everything. Aces, practice a little with a few different knives, but not a lot. I don't want people to see what you can do just yet. We're going to keep playing up the weak girl act. Maybe trip a few times." Haymitch instructs. I nod and stand up with Sam.

"Off you go!" Effie says. We get into the elevator and the Avox inside pushes a button, causing it to drop quickly.

When the doors open we get our first look of the training center. We're one of the first pairs here. I go straight for the plants, I don't want to go out in the first day because I didn't know what to eat.

I spend twenty minutes on that, and I'm no expert of course, but at least I know the difference between raspberries and poisonous berries now. After that I go to the camouflage station, but give up after merely five minutes. Art has always been my weak area.

Next I head over to the climbing ropes, and give it a try. I get maybe ⅓ up before I remember what Haymitch told me. I look below me and reach up, purposely missing the rung. I fall down, it was only about five feet, and cringe as my back hits the cold floor.

Laughter rings out and I look over at the Careers by the swords. I shake my head and stand up, walking over to where the weights are. I start off with ten, adding five after a little bit.

I add more weight until I reach thirty, and then I can't go anymore than that for fear of someone noticing that I'm not as weak as I look.

Years of swinging cleavers and axes have given me quite a bit of muscle.

On the way to lunch I trip myself up, landing on my face and giving myself a bloody nose on accident. Oh well, at least I look really incompetent now.

They stop the bleeding quickly and I'm ushered off to eat.

My eyes never leave the knife station from the moment I stand up to take care of my tray. I walk over there slowly, looking around to make sure no one is watching before I grab one of the knives.

I flip it around in my hand a few times to get a feel for the weight, before bringing my arm up and flicking my wrist out. It sticks in the shoulder of the target board. I huff and grab another one, hitting the liver area this time.

That's better, I guess.

The next one I grab is longer, more like the ones we used in the shop. I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I blow out the air slowly and open my eyes. I aim, and throw.

It hits right between the eyes.

And I think that's when Haymitch would want me to stop. I pretend to shudder and have a small mental breakdown, so everyone thinks I wouldn't actually be able to bring myself to kill someone like that.

But I know I could. And I will.

I look around after that for twenty minutes, just watching everyone else train. The girl from one is great with a sword. The boy from two is not bad with a bow. The girl from five is busy climbing, way higher than I got. I make mental notes of who is going to be my greatest competition.

I hate to think that I'm going to have to kill these people in a matter of days.

After that I stick to the survival stuff. I quickly learn how to start a fire, how to tie a snare. How to weave leaves and sticks to make a blind. I learn which water is safe to drink and which is not. And then I head back over to the plant screen.

I'm much faster this time, clicking on what's good as soon as I see it, mostly. I'm about five minutes in when I hit what I thought was a blueberry. The screen goes red and the words 'Tribute Death' flash on the screen. I cringe and read the explanation. What I thought was a blueberry was something called Nightlock. Apparently very poisonous. I take an extra five minutes just studying this berry. I don't want to make the same mistake in the arena.

After that I move on to the medical plants that could help heal certain wounds I might, and most likely will, get.

I look around and see Sam struggling to wield a simple knife. The instructor is trying and failing miserably to show him. I sigh and walk over there.

He may be my competition, but I don't think he'll get very far anyways. And I couldn't deal with the guilt of knowing he couldn't even wield a knife to protect himself with in the arena.

"Here. Let me see it." I say, holding out my hand. He looks at me in shock and confusion for a moment, before placing the knife in my hand.

"Watch me." I bring my arm up and close my left eye, before releasing the blade with a flick of my wrist. It sticks in the chest.

"W-What? How did you do that?" He asks.

"You need to close your non-dominant eye when trying to aim. And you don't need to bring your arm so far back. Oh, and your barely have to move your wrist, just a small movement to get it flying. The more you move your wrist, the more uncontrollable it gets." I say. He nods and grabs another one. He follows my tips and finally throws it, hitting the board in the thigh area. I nod.

"That's a lot better. He'd be down for at least a few seconds, which gives you a running start." I say, walking away.

I might regret helping him later, but I feel much better for the time being.


	4. I'm back!

Author's Note: Both Aces and Gale are seventeen and Katniss is fifteen, Posy is fourteen. Prim is eleven, and Vick is four. Also, Rooba is merchant for this story, just cause it works better.

* * *

"Now, today after training they'll asses each of you privately. You'll both get a number correlating to how good you are at whatever you show them. Sam, I think it wise for you to try to get somewhere around seven. No less, and no more than nine. We don't want you to seem like too much of a threat but also not too weak." Haymitch says, looking at Sam seriously. He then turns to me, brushing his hair out of his face.

"And you girl. Get something low. Maybe a four or something. But not too low or you won't get any sponsors. Try not to seem too good or they might give you a seven or an eight, which would end your innocent act." He instructs. I nod my head and push the fruit around my plate.

What was I going to do? Throw some knives? That's not very impressive. But they don't have cleavers, and it feels wrong using an axe when another girl did the same not too long ago.

I want to be unique.

Is that so wrong? When soon I could be dead? Must I be such a carbon copy of everyone else?

We go down to training again, the third day in a row. I do the same as I did the first day, minus the knife throwing. I've heard enough of Haymitch's yelling.

We eat lunch, and I wonder if maybe I should be eating more in these days before the Games. But then I think of how I mostly had enough to eat every day, and in there I will have most likely nothing. In a way, I am preparing myself in the matter of food.

After another hour of training they make us sit together in a waiting room off to the side that I hadn't noticed before. The girl from One goes first, Emerald, I think her name was. One is odd.

I sit back and close my eyes, hoping to catch maybe a few minutes of rest. That's definitely something you want to stock up on before the Arena.

And before I know it, an Aces Smith is being called into the training room to show off her skills of survival and murder.

Murder. Because that's what I must do in a day or two.

I walk in and take a deep breath. My eyes flit around the area for what I should do, and I have to hold back a gasp when my eyes catch on a gleaming meat cleaver. Just like I used at home.

My eyes widen and I walk straight over to it, grasping it firmly in my hands.

And then Haymitch's voice worms its way into my brain, and my small smile drops.

Right.

Here goes…

I pick up the cleaver, but pretend to drop it. I cringe and look up at the game makers.

"S-Sorry."I stutter, hoping to sound incompetent.

They seem to have lost interest, which means ill most likely be getting a low score no matter what I do. I shrug and walk over to the targets, throwing the cleaver towards the board and missing by a few feet.

I hold back a snicker when I hear more than one of the men sigh in irritation.

Let's have some fun, shall we?

I grab it up again and throw it, but it ends short and doesn't go closer than a few feet to the targets.

I throw it around some more and once I realize that they are occupied with conversing and eating, I grab it and look up at them, making sure they don't see that I'm not as bad as I seem.

I whip the cleaver around, my fingers sliding across the smooth metal as it spins through the air and hits the dummies in the head, handle sticking up towards the sky.

"You may be dismissed." Someone says, and I look up to the overhead ledge where the men sat.

I turn on my heel and walk out, wondering if anyone had seen.

I sit on the couch with my knees drawn to my chest as we wait anxiously for the scores to be announced.

"Don't worry, Aces. I'm sure you did just fine, dear!" Effie coos as she sits down next to me.

"You can say don't worry when this score doesn't affect your life." I say. Sam comes in and sits down just as the screen comes to life.

Caesar Flickerman's face appears on it and he smiles under his smock of red hair. He jokes around in between the reading of each score, and I feel even more sick as he finishes with District Ten.

And then before I know it, my face is on the screen, and before I can pray once more a big silver five pops up next to my head. I breathe out a sigh of relief. I look to Haymitch for approval, I suppose, and he nods his head once.

I did good.

I could win.

"Alright, Effie thinks it would be best if Aces went with with her first for four hours or so, and Sam comes with me. Then we switch."

"Why?" Sam asks.

"So that we can each devote our full attention to each of you. Also, Effie has to work on different things with Aces than she does with you." Haymitch explains.

So I go with Effie, and she shoves my feet into about ten different shoes with different heights. I'm worried I'm going to accidentally break my ankles before I go into the arena, and when I tell her this she reluctantly gives me shorter shoes. She tells me to blush a lot, and keep my head down, and to look up through my eyelashes, and to smile all the time.

To seem sweet and innocent, she says. I just do what she says.

After four torturous hours of walking on stilts with books on my head I trade places with Sam, and I give him a pitying smile and walk into the room he just left. Haymitch sits me down and asks me example questions of what I might have to answer.

Stuff like, 'what is your favorite thing about the Capitol?', and I say 'the carpet in my room.'

And then he asks me why I volunteered for that girl in my District, and I know he's only asking because we both know Caesar will, but I blush all the same. He gives me a funny look and leans closer.

"Answer this one truthfully right now, Aces. We might be able to use your answer to your advantage." He says, looking at me expectantly. I sigh and look down at my laced fingers.

"Because I like her brother." I murmured.

"What?" He asks. I sigh again and look up awkwardly at the ceiling.

"I have a crush on her older brother." I say, louder. It's silent for a moment, before he starts laughing. I look back at him and glare.

"What's so damn funny?" I demand.

"You like Gale Hawthorne?" He says.

"Yes, what's so funny about about that?" I ask angrily.

"Nothing, nothing… It's just that he's a Seam kid, and you're… Well, the granddaughter of one of the most townish woman." He says.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah. I know."

He puts his finger on his chin and leans back in thought.

"Although, this could actually work very well for you! How much would you say you like this kid?" He asked me. I blushed again.

"A lot, I guess."

"Okay, so when Caesar asks you why you volunteered for that little girl, you're going to tell him it was because you are madly in love with her older brother, and you couldn't bare to see her go in there and get hurt, and for him to lose his little sister. You got that?" He asked. I nodded my head.

I didn't want to say that. It wasn't exactly how I had planned for Gale to find out about my secret crush on him. Although, I've liked him since I was eleven, so I suppose that's my own fault for not telling him sooner. I guess I just figured that Peeta would tell him some time if I died in the arena. When we turned twelve and had to go to our first reaping, we vowed to tell the other's crush that said person really liked them if they were to get reaped and killed.

So if it was Peeta here instead of me, I'd probably have to tell Katniss that Peeta's been in love with her since he was five.

I'm sure that would have gone so well.

Note the sarcasm.

"Alright. I think that's all I can help you with. Just make sure to seem as innocent and incapable as possible up there." He says.

"I will. Thanks, Haymitch." I say. He nods awkwardly and shoos me out.

I'm met by Effie and Sam, and she takes us down to our stylists where we all split ways.

I groan inwardly as I remember my first encounter with my makeup team and Jannette. I walk in and lay down on the table, where they get to work on stripping me of hair again and rubbing my skin down with oils and lotions.

And then Jannette sits me up and is wrapping my hair up with blue pins and pearl bands until my hair was up in a messy updo with red curls framing my face and a small amount of hair cascading down my back. She hands me a black dress that reaches just above my knees and slowly fades into orange which then fades into red at the bottom with little sequins, so when I move too quick I look like I'm a slowly dying ember.

She applies thick dark red lipstick to my lips and puts pink eyeshadow on before handing me a pair of red sparkly flats.

"There. You look beautiful now!" She coos, and I frown.

"Oh, you look wonderful, Aces!" Effie swoons as I walk over to her and Sam.

"Have the interviews started yet?" I ask. She nods.

"But don't worry, they're only on District Four!" She squeals. I roll my eyes and join Sam at the end of the line. He's wearing a red and orange blended button up with a black tie and slacks.

"Are you worried?" He whispers. I shrug.

"Nah. Just nauseous." I joke, smiling lightly at him. He laughs and agrees.

I listen to all of the interviews, picking up do's and don't's and picking out who to stay away from in the ring.

I was happy to miss districts One and Two, and half of Four. The Career Districts. Although, it could have been good to hear them talk about stuff to get tips maybe on how to outlive them. But who knows. I'll probably lose quickly, anyways.

My mind drifts off to what the arena might be like, not for the first time.

"And from District Twelve, ACES SMITH!" Caesar's voice yells excitedly, pulling me from my reverie. I blanch and stand there for a moment, before Sam pushes me forward.

"Go. Don't worry, you'll do great." He murmurs, and I pull a smile onto my face.

"Hello, hello!" Caesar says, motioning me over. "How are you, come, come, sit!" I sit down in the chair he points to and he sits in the adjacent one.

"I'm great, Caesar. I've never been better! The beds here are great!" I say, giggling at the end, "And how are you, Caesar?" I ask sweetly.

"Oh, so polite! I am great as well. Isn't she just a dear?" He asks the audience, and the crowd roars in cheers and approval.

"Awe, thanks, Caesar!" I swoon.

"No problem, no problem. Now. Let's get down to business! What is your favorite thing here in the Capitol?" He asks, leaning forward with (probably fake) interest.

"Well, I would have to say that it would be the carpets you all have. It's so incredibly colorful, and soft!"

"Do you not have carpet in your house?" He asks, and I have a feeling he's stepping into dangerous territory.

"Oh, no, my Grandmother says it hurts her sensitive skin, you see?" I lied. No reason to get into trouble for speaking about how poor the Districts are.

"Ah, yes. Do you have any hobbies, Aces?" He questions.

"Hmm. Yes, I like to read, and… Sew. And I help around the house a lot." I lie again. How am I supposed to sound "innocent" and "incompetent"?

We talk some more, like my favorite food, or my friends back home in school. And I can tell the three minutes are almost up, so I have a feeling I know what's coming next.

"So, Aces. I think we were all… Touched, by your volunteering for that little girl. Who was she, exactly?" He asks softly. I close my eyes and take a deep breath, and when I open them I can practically hear the silence.

"Well, I don't really know her. In fact, I've never talked to her before after the Reaping. She's just a really sweet girl who's never done anything wrong in her life, I'm sure. She wouldn't have made it very far in these Games, but then again, neither will I. But I don't have much of a life back home as she does. She's got a pretty big family." I say. Caesar nods his head sadly.

"Well, don't write yourself off so soon, Aces. I for one would like to see you come out of this thing! Anyways. I have, just one last question." He says, and I smile sweetly.

"Whatever could that be?"

"If you say you never really knew this Hawthorne girl, then why ever would you volunteer to fight to the death for her? Sure, you said she wouldn't last and didn't deserve it, or had a family, but you fit into all of those categories from what I see. Except maybe the first one." He says, winking at me. I blush and look off to my left.

"Ooo, you're holding back! Tell us, tell us!" He insists. I sigh and look down at my clasped hands in my lap.

"Well… You see Caesar? I said before that Posy has quite a large family. She has Two younger brothers, and an older brother." I start, and take another deep breath to try and calm down, but it doesn't really help.

"But that's not all you have to tell us, is it, Aces?" He asks slowly, prompting me to continue. I shake my head and sigh.

"No. I-" I look up then, out at the audience and every person on the edge of their seat. I think of everyone back home who is watching this from the square. I never told my grandma, but I know she knows; she's too smart to not.

I think about Gale, and how supremely mad he will be when he hears this.

"I… I've loved her older brother since I was thirteen." I say, and the buzzer goes off.

The crowd starts screaming. I shoot Caesar one last smile, and his face looks slack with shock. I take a sigh of relief because I don't have to answer any more questions, and I know I won't have to see-or deal with- Gale's rage and fury, because I won't be going home.

At least I don't plan on it. If I do, great. Right?


	5. The start of the end

_"No. I-" I look up then, out at the audience and every person on the edge of their seat. I think of everyone back home who is watching this_

 _The crowd starts screaming. I shoot Caesar one last smile, and his face looks slack with shock. I take a sigh of relief because I don't have to answer any more questions, and I know I won't have to see-or deal with- Gale's rage and fury, because I won't be going home._

 _At least I don't plan on it. If I do, great. Right?_

I stand, shaking, in the room that is going to bring me up to the arena. My eyes are glued to the glass cylinder and I can't eat the food at my side because I already feel like I am going to sick up everywhere.

" _30 seconds. Please enter the tube."_ A women's voice says from a hidden speaker somewhere. I slowly start walking towards the tube as it counts down the seconds.

 _20._

 _I don't want to_

 _15_

 _Someone help me._

 _10._

 _Grandma, I love you._

 _5._

 _Peeta, I'll miss our odd conversations._

 _2\. Twelve, you will always be my home._

 _1._

 _Gale, I'll always love you._

The glass door slides in front of me and seals shut. My breaths get deeper and shallower as I feel like the oxygen has been cut off. And then I'm rising, and I can see the sky, but it's all so bright, and then I can't see anything but white.

I squint my eyes shut and listen to the nothingness around me. I hear no birds, no wind, no nothing. All I can feel is the chilly nip of the air. I force my eyes open and look around me. Another damn countdown starts, and I can see the large, golden cornucopia in the middle of what looks to be a run down city square. The buildings are crumbling cinder blocks and wooden poles. Most of them are missing roofs and at least one wall.

There isn't a single house that's not ruined in some way. I zip my jacket up higher to try and keep out the cold. I look at the piles of weapons. I don't see a cleaver or any big knives, but I do see an axe. I look quickly at the tributes around me.

Didn't Haymitch say something about staying away from the blood bath? I look around the ground closer to me, and can see a simple satchel down a little ways from me.

Just as the gong sounds I decide to go for that, and jump off my pedestal, sprinting towards the little brown shoulder bag. I sling it quickly over my head and take off towards a building that looks to have more support. I run through the old… House? Is that what this is? I can't tell, because it's all rotting. I end up in a kitchen, and spot a frying pan hanging on the wall. I quickly grab that and hide in the corner.

I slowly get my breath back, and maybe a little bit of my sanity, and then I can hear footsteps. And they're getting closer. I grip the frying pan closer to my body and wait with baited breath and wide eyes for whoever it is to come around the corner.

GPOV

Posy sits in my lap, crying softly, and gripping my arm tightly. I get that this girl saved her from having to be in the Games, but I don't get why she's so worked up over her. Call me heartless, I don't care.

I'm not really paying the screen much attention, but then Posy gasps, and grips my arm so tight her nails are digging into my skin. I look up just in time to see the boy from five come around the corner, spear up and at the ready. He doesn't seem to have noticed the small redhead, and that's his downfall.

Aces quickly raises her pan and hits him on the head. He instantly drops, and lets out a moan so she hits him again. A cannon goes off and she drops the pan, covering her mouth with her hand. I can see her chest heaving and tears rolling down her face. I roll my eyes.

APOV

Oh my God. Oh my God. I just killed him. Oh my God.

"Deep breaths, deep breaths." I mutter to myself, sliding down the wall and sitting in the corner with my knees to my chest and my hands on my head.

My eyes are clouding up with more tears, but I wipe them away before standing up. I take a deep breath and then quickly grab the bloody pan, before running from the room. I blink in the sun before taking off down the road. Once I find another empty place I sit down in an old closet and look through my bag, put my hair up, anything to keep my mind away from what I've just done.

There's an empty water bottle and some matches, and a blanket. That's pretty much it. I take off my belt and wrap it securely around the door handles so that it can't be opened, and then I wrap myself in the blanket, instantly feeling a little warmer. I huddle in the dark corner and try to calm down. I've survived the bloodbath. I've survived the first hour. I'll survive my first kill. I won't let this take me out.

Maybe I really do have a shot at getting home.

GPOV

I scoff as she falls asleep in the old closet thing. Posy turns around and glares at me.

"What? That's probably the stupidest thing she could do." I say, rolling my eyes.

"Show her some respect, Gale. That'd be me if it wasn't for her." Posy scolds.

"Yeah, well you'd probably do better than her." I say, and she hits me on the head.

"Gale! That doesn't matter! She threw her life away!" She says, tears forming in her eyes. She's so sensitive sometimes, I swear.

"Posy's right, Gale." My mother says, "Besides. You should be happy that someone likes you so much they'd be willing to die in place for your sister so that you don't have to lose her."

"Oh, come on, Mom. You really believed that? It was obviously a lie. She just wanted more sponsors."

"Then why would she volunteer for me? Why are you being so cold?" Posy asks, disappointment on her face.

"Because she's a townie, Posy! There's no way she was telling the truth. She probably just wanted the shot at glory, and if she dies, well, she still gets glory because she died in your place." I say angrily, moving Posy and standing up.

"Where are you going?" Mother asks me.

"I'm going to bed." I say, and that's exactly what I do. I fell asleep almost instantly, but it wasn't for longer than five or ten minutes. I wake up with a start at hearing an ear splitting shriek. I'm up and out of the bed and in the living room within seconds.

"What happened? Is everyone alright?" I demand.

APOV

I woke up after hearing someone talking to somebody else in one of the rooms over.

Not again.

I quickly unwrap the tie and put my belt back on, and put the blanket back in the satchel before standing ready with the pan. Someone throws open the door to the room that's connected to my hiding spot, and two people come walking in. I can't tell who they are, but I think at least one is female. I try to keep my breathing quiet, and I exhale in relief when they leave.

I should leave too.

I slowly and soundlessly open the doors and sneak out, poking my head around the corner of the doorway from which they just left. I'm about to make a run for it when a girl shrieks from down the hall, and I jump, my eyes wide.

"Run!" Someone yells, and I decide if they're running, so should I. So I book it out of there, colliding with the girl from earlier, knocking us both to the floor. The boy from eight runs by us and out of the building, and I try to stand up. The blonde latches onto my leg and pulls me down while also pulling herself up.

And then I hear it.

It sounds like nails on a chalkboard and some type of dying animal. I scramble up again and shove the blonde girl forward.

"Run!" I yell at her, hearing the thing come out into the hallway. I chance a look behind me and thank my lucky stars that I didn't just soil my pants on national TV. A giant black, bird like thing with rubbery skin is at the end of the hall, stretching it's wings.

"OH MY CRAP, RUN FASTER!" I yell, shoving her around the corner and then grabbing her hand and dragging her behind me because she's going way too slow.

"IS IT COMING?!" She yells back.

"WHAT DO YOU THINK?!" I reply before finally running out the empty doorway and into the sun once again. The boy stands outside and gives me a funny look.

"I can't believe you left me in there, Ryan!" The blonde yells, shoving the guy-Ryna- in the chest. He doesn't even flinch.

"Um, I think we should continue running…" I start, before screaming and rolling out of the way of the mutt that I now see as a large bat.

The blonde ducks and covers her head with her arms, but Ryan isn't so quick. THe bat snatches him up by the throat and carries him off. We watch with wide eyes as the bat takes to the darkening sky, and soon we can hear his cannon firing.

"Oh my God!" The blonde cries, and starts to stand up. She's about to run off when she turns back to me.

"...Allies?"

I look up at her, confused as to what she's saying.

"I mean, you did kinda just save my life back there instead of just tripping me and running." She explains.

"Um… Sure." I say, grabbing her hand and letting her help me up.

"I'm Rebekah, but you can call me Bekah. You're Aces, right?" She asks. I nod and look around us.

"Where should we go? It's getting dark and now I'm not so sure it's safe to be inside or outside." I say softly. Bekah shrugs.

"I have no id-" She starts, but then the sky lights up and the anthem starts.

First is the pair from three, and then the boy from four, both from five. I close my eyes tight when they show the picture of the boy I killed. None from six, boy from seven, and Ryan. The girl from eleven is dead, and then that's the end of the list. That's only eight. We are so screwed.

Bekah and I find an overhang behind one of the buildings, and wrap ourselves up together in the blanket that I realize now must be insulated. I'm so happy I listened to what I think Haymitch said and skipped the blood bath and grabbed that satchel.

My throat is dry, my stomach's empty, but at least I'm warm.

Maybe an hour later I can tell the temperature has dropped at least twenty degrees, and now I can't feel my toes or my nose.

A cannon goes off. And then fifteen minutes later another goes off. And then two hours later, when it's colder than I have ever felt before, three more go off. That brings it up to thirteen, and Bekah and I are in the last eleven. I take a deep breath and try to get some sleep now that Rebekah has taken over watch.

So, how'd you like the Gale point of view? Should I continue that?


	6. The second day

_A cannon goes off. And then fifteen minutes later another goes off. And then two hours later, when it's colder than I have ever felt before, three more go off. That brings it up to thirteen, and Bekah and I are in the last eleven. I take a deep breath and try to get some sleep now that Rebekah has taken over watch._

I blink open my eyes to blinding sunlight, and wonder briefly if I may have died and gone to Heaven.

"Don't be ridiculous. You're still alive." Someone says next to me and I look over and see Rebekah.

"Did I say that outloud?"

She nods and stands up, "We should probably find some food or water." I look around before standing up as well, throwing the blanket into my bag.

With my pan in my hand and her knife in hers, we head off. She said that we should check the cornucopia first, but said that I thought I heard a river or something off to the west.

She looked around us, her hand blocking the sun from her eyes, and said that we should split up.

"Split up? I don't think that's a good idea. That's always when someone dies, Bekah." I say nervously.

"Oh don't worry, we'll be fine. We need food and water if we want to survive, don't we?" I pursed my lips and nodded, my crazy red curls bouncing around my face from where they slipped out of my ponytail.

"Okay! It's settled. I'll go try to find whatever I can at the cornucopia, and you try and find that stream." I nodded and turned in the direction where I last heard it from.

GPOV

"I can't believe they're splitting up." Posy said, burying her head in my arm. I shifted uncomfortably in the town's square-where we were being forced to watch it today- and looked at Katniss.

"I wouldn't have allied with that girl in the first place."

"Why not?" Posy asked, turning to look at Katniss, and then the blonde girl on screen.

"I just don't trust her." She said. I nodded.

"Aces!" Rebekah called to the redhead, and we shifted our attention back to the TV.

"Yeah?"

"Let's meet up at the house from last night, okay?"

"Got it!" Aces called before running off. The screen switched back and forth between the two, but it didn't seem like Rebekah was actually heading towards the center of the arena.

Katniss and Posy where conspiring as to where the blonde was actually going, when the screen zoomed way out, and all we could see was buildings and two little dots. One labeled 'SMITH' and the other 'MENDE', which must have been Rebekah. She was looping back around and following Aces.

"How stupid is she? Can't she tell that she's been followed" I say as the screen focuses on Aces again.

"Gale, stop. She's not a hunter like you."

"She is right, Gale." Katniss says, and I turn to look at her.

I shake my head and focus on the screen again. Aces turns a corner and steps into another little open area, where a large water fountain stands, spurting out water.

"You have to admit, that was pretty impressive she could hear that." Katniss says.

APOV

I sigh in relief and rush forward, dunking my head into the pool and then pull out the empty water bottle and fill it up. I'm halfway through drinking it when I hear something behind me. I twirl around quickly just in time to see Rebekah lunge at me with her knife. I grab her hands and twist, causing her to cry out and pull away.

"I have no idea how you heard that water, but thank you for showing it to me."

"What? If you wanted the damn water why go through the trouble of going around the block and following me?"

"How'd you know I went around the block?" Rebekah asks, lowering her knife and looking at me in confusion. I shrugged.

"Lucky guess." I say before running at her with my frying pan. I miss the first hit, but hit her on the back of the head as I pull it back to me.

"You little-!" She starts, but her words break off as I hit her in the face.

Blood pours down from her nose, and she glares at me.

"You want to play with blood? You're on." Rebekah growls, lunging at me and slashing my arm with knife.

I curse and grab my arm as the shirt slowly soaks up my blood. The dark material becomes darker.

She runs at me again and I roll into her legs, knocking her over. I flip over on top of her, grabbing her knife and aiming it at her throat. She grunts and tries to turn the knife towards me.

"What are you doing, Aces? I thought you were a scared little girl?" Rebekah taunts.

"Obviously, other wise I wouldn't be trying to kill you."

"Lies. You'd be trying to kill me if you weren't scared."

"Maybe. But I probably wouldn't have allied with you then."

"Fine. You think you can kill me? Here." She says, smirking at me and letting go of the knife.

"Kill me."

I know she thinks I can't do it. I wish I didn't have to.

I take deep breath, close my eyes, and thrust the knife down. I cringe when blood splatters up on my face, and stand up.

I look down at the blonde, whose hair is turning red as her blood seeps out and around her. I back away and sit on the edge of the fountain as a hover comes down and takes her up.

I look at my arm and take my black jacket off, leaving me in my long sleeved grey shirt. I rip my sleeve off to see the wound. My upper arm is leaking blood from a deep but relatively short cut. I sigh and dip my sleeve in water before cleaning up all the blood and then wrapping it up tightly so it will stop bleeding. I put my jacket back on and finish my water bottle before filling it again and putting it in my bag.

GPOV

"There's so much blood." Posy says, crying into Katniss' shoulder.

"Posy it's okay. The hover took her already." Katniss says, and Posy looks back at the screen.

"Is her arm going to be okay?" She asks. Posy is way too soft for this world.

"She'll be fine." I say, not really caring if she dies or not.

"Good. I want her to win." I choke on the air and cough.

"What?"

"I want her to win." Posy repeats.

"What is wrong with you?" I ask.

"What is wrong with you, Gale?" Katniss says.

"She's a townie!"

"She may be a townie, gale, but she saved your sister's life. You shouldn't be so cruel."

"I'm not being cruel. I'm being real. There's no way she'll win." I say, crossing my arms and looking back at the screen.

APOV

That's fourteen dead, right? I think to myself. If so, that leaves ten of us left. I take a deep breath. You can do this.


	7. Seven

_That's fourteen dead, right? I think to myself. If so, that leaves ten of us left. I take a deep breath. You can do this._

 _Agpkagpkagpkagpkagpk_

The streets are still and silent. The air is cold and thick, but there is no noise. Anywhere.

The arena is freezing, and two more people died last night from the cold. I almost lit a fire, but decided against it. I might light one tonight.

There's only eight of us left, and when one more person dies they'll be questioning our families and putting the interviews on screen.

I wonder if I'll be the seventeenth person to die, or if they'll be interviewing my grandmother soon.

I wonder if they are going to intervene if someone doesn't die an 'interesting' death soon.

It's so _cold._

I'm so _hungry._

My feet hurt. I can't feel my fingers anymore.

Sometimes I wish that I would be the next to die, just so I can get out of here.

But then I think about Grandma.

And Posy, how she doesn't know me, but I know she will feel guilty if I die.

And Peeta. If I died he'd be the only townie that likes the Seam people.

And Gale.

I think I probably think about Gale the most.

It's a problem.

A scream pierces the air. I scare so badly I drop my pan. Another scream. Leaning down, I snatch my pathetic weapon up and sprint off in the direction of the girl's screams.

"Help! Somebody help!" I turn a corner and nearly slam right into the wall across the way, and there, in the middle of the street, is the screaming girl. She's grasping her face and shrieking as a boy tries to lift his foot from a sharp metal trap.

"What happened?" I asked, and they both whipped around to stare at me. I held my hands up to show them I wasn't going to... you know.

"We were running and he stepped on this weird plate and the spikes came up and latched into his boot." The black haired girl cried, tears streaming like rivers down her cheeks.

"A plate? Like a weight plate?" I said, thinking of the plates we used to weigh the meat back home. She nodded and sniffled.

"Why does it matter what kind of plate it is? I just need to get free." The boy said snootily.

Thinking about previous arenas, I could remember one year where there was pressure sensors in the ground, and when triggered they would explode.

Looking back to the two people, I could see that the girl had stared pulling away the spikes, and the two of them were almost finished.

"Wait!" I screamed. "Don't-" the boy yanked his foot up and out, and the ground exploded from beneath him.

The girl screamed again. I coughed, and tried to wave the dust away from my face.

I carefully walked forward, not wanting to step on another one of those,

As the dust cleared I could see what was left of the blonde haired boy, and a few feet away laid the screaming girl. Her legs and half her arm had been blown off by the explosion, and now lay in shreds around her.

There was blood _everywhere._

"H-help." She coughed. I leaned down on my knees next to her head.

"It's okay. It's going to be okay. It's okay. Everything's okay." I chanted over and over and over, trying to reassure not only her.

"I'm sorry. I tried to help-" She looked up at me and raised a bloody hand to my face.

"It's okay. Th-thank yo-oh. Ow. W-will you win? For us-s?" She stuttered.

I nodded, dumbfounded. She coughed once more, blood bubbling out of her mouth, before her chest fell one last time and her cold hand slid down my cheek and fell to the stone beneath her.

Her eyes stared un-seeingly up at the sky, and I followed her empty gaze up. The sky was a murky, light blue, spotted with puffy white clouds.

They couldn't even put a nice fake sky in here for us.

I sighed and closed the girls eyes, grabbing my pan and standing up. I decided it probably wouldn't be smart to continue down the road so I turned around and went the way I came from.


	8. Eight

_I sighed and closed the girls eyes, grabbing my pan and standing up. I decided it probably wouldn't be smart to continue down the road so I turned around and went the way I came from._

 _Agpkagpkagpk_

A scream worked it's way up my throat, and got stuck. I swung my pan at the boys head, but he merely deflected it with his arm. I continued to back away as he continued to come closer.

"You really are a pathetic little girl, aren't you?" He sneered, before laughing and slashing at my face with his dagger. I gasped as the tip of it caught my cheek, ripping down.

I tried to hit him again, and screamed in frustration as I missed. _Again._

There was an odd whistling sound from above us, and I looked up.

 _A parachute._

 _Oh please God, let that be for me._

I looked back at the district two boy, and he looks from the package on the ground to me.

I turn quickly and sprint towards the box, with him hot on my heels. But he's much larger than I am, so I'm faster. My legs may be short, but they don't have much to carry. I get there first, by merely seconds. But I don't stop. I grab the box and continue running while forcing it open.

Inside lays a meat cleaver. The shiny metal material twinkles up at me, and I grin. Grabbing the Handel, I stop and swing it out as I turn around, and it connects with the unsuspecting chest of district two.

His eyes grow wide as I yank it back, and bring it down again, this time where his shoulder connects to his neck. Blood spurts out and he screams like a little girl, falling over. I stand over him and take it out again, raising it over my head and bringing it down one last time. Blood spurts up on my face, and I clench my eyes and teeth. The cannon goes off.

When I open my eyes all I can see is my new cleaver sticking out from his skull, and the thick red blood filling the street. I cringe as I pull out the large knife.

There's only five of us left.

GPOV

"Do you think they'll interview us?" Posy asks excitedly. There was only five tributes left, and somehow the Smith girl had made it into that group.

"I doubt it." I grunted.

Posy frowned.

"Why wouldn't they?"

I sighed. "Because we aren't her family or her friends." I say, only to be interrupted by a knock on the door. Posy squeals and rushed forward, throwing the door open. There stands a camera crew.

"We're here to interview the Hawthorne family."

You've got to be kidding me.

APOV

I study my new weapon as I lean against a wall far from the bleeding body.

The handle is smooth, new, shiny. So is the blade. It looks nothing like the meat cleavers at home in color or newness.

I'm so caught up in my thoughts of home and meat cleavers that I don't notice the water rushing in, until it hits my feet. I squeal in shock. If I thought the arena was cold, then this was way worse. I scrambled up, using the wall to get on my feet.

I look around. The water is pouring in from between the walls and buildings. So I do the only natural thing.

I scream and run away.

Like most people in twelve, I have absolutely no idea how to swim, so if I get caught up I'm done for.

The water continues to fill the streets behind me, and I can see that it's pushing my towards the cornucopia. I can see water from the opposite side rushing forward too, and then I notice the doors.

They're thick metal, going up almost all the way to the top of the arena. And they're closing.

Fast.

So I run faster. And faster. Until I'm running so fast I might trip, and all I can think is:

 _You're not supposed to run with cleavers. You're not supposed to run with cleavers._

I slip in between the thick metal doors as they are about to close, and some water spills in after me before they slam together.

I double over and place my hands on my knees, trying to catch my breath.

Three more doors close around the city center, and I look around.

There's the girl from four, the boy from one, the boy from eleven, and Sam.

 _How did I forget about him?_

And we're all trapped in here.

The boy from one turns and starts battling with the girl from four. They came from the same direction so they must have been fighting before the water came. Sam and the boy from eleven share a look before those two start fighting too.

As what do I do?

Stand there in shocked, scared silence.

A blood curdling scream echoes around the square, and my head whips so fast to the left that I hear something pop. I cringe and look over to where the boy from two had drove his sword through the girl.

My eyes grow wide and I swallow thickly.

None of them seem to have seen me yet, otherwise he would have tried to kill me next instead of joining the fight with Sam and the dark skinned boy.

I look around, trying to figure out what to do.

In the cornucopia lays a long, sharp pole, both ends ending in points. So as quickly and quietly as I can, I run over there and grab that, before climbing up one of the buildings next to the fight. It groans and I gasp, hoping to everything that it won't collapse. I quickly jump to the next building, and then bellow me is the boy from two. I take a deep breath and throw the pole down as hard as I can, and it hits him on the back.

What I didn't expect, however, was for it to go completely through him. I gag, and almost fall off the beam I'm standing on.

Sam and Eleven look up, and then back at each other, and back at me.

Eleven quickly slashes Sam's throat, and I scream.

He then proceeds to climb the building as well, until he's on the same beam as I am.

I continue backing up, knowing that in running out of wood to stand on.

I unlatch my cleaver from my belt and aim. I barely miss his head, but that doesn't help me, does it? I curse and look around for any sort of weapon. I look down and see that some of the beams end in sharp broken metal.

Looking up I can see another metal bar that seems sturdy enough. So I wait for the boy to get closer, and at the last moment I jump up and grab the bar, kicking him as hard as I can in the chest.

He holds onto his balance momentarily, before toppling over.

I hear a sickening crunch as he lands on one of the broken pieces, and a few moments late the cannon goes off.

I sigh in relief and look around, before realizing that I'm the only one left.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I present you the winner of the 73rd Hunger Games, Aces Smith." The commentator says.

My head swirls, and I have to sit down on the beam so I don't fall off too.

A hover appears from a spot in the ceiling, and it releases a black rope ladder. I shakily reach out and grab it, and am shocked when it locks me in place.

The ladder starts going back up into the hover, and then I'm in the middle of doctors rushing around and grabbing my arm and fingers and my face.

The last thing I see before I black out is the real sky through the windows.

It's just as dark and murky as it was inside.


	9. Chapter 9

_The last thing I see before I black out is the real sky through the windows._

 _It's just as dark and murky as it was inside._

 _Agpkagpkagpk_

The next week was a blur. I woke up in a hospital room, with wires and needles sticking out from beneath my skin. My red hair clean again, which also meant it should have been frizzy again. But thank God for Capitol hair products.

Never thought I'd say that.

The next day they let me out, and I was immediately wisked away by my old stylist, Jannett, and she starts working on my body like before I went in the arena. Within five hours I'm completely hair free -besides my eyebrows and the hair on my head- and dressed in a long, flowy, light mint dress. My usually frizzy and curly hair floats down in smooth waves, pushed back by a mint headband. My eyelashes are long and black, and my freckles are more prominent.

"Here. Wear these." Jannette says, shoving a pair of sparkly red flats under my nose. I sigh and put them on.

An hour later and I'm standing on yet another metal disk plate, rising up to be greeted by blinding sunlight. At first my heart races, thinking they're sending me into another death trap. But then I open my eyes and I'm surrounded by screaming capitalists, and Ceaser Flickerman is standing next to me.

And then he's introducing me to the crowd, and in sitting down. Questions and video clips and more questions and more video clips...

And nightmares. So many nightmares. They wake me up every night. Some night are worse than others. I'll wake up anywhere from five to eleven times a night.

I never thought I would miss sleep so much.

"Are you ready to go back home, kid?" Haymitch asks the morning after the interview. He pauses for a moment, before adding, "Didn't think I'd ever get to say that."

"We both proved you wrong." I said, looking out the window of the car that takes us to the train station. I would be home soon.

I would be _home_ soon.

The train pulls o a stop in the small rundown station of District Twelve. I look out the window to see at least 2/3 of the district standing there, cheering. We hadn't had a victor in so long. I could see my grandma towards the front of the crowd, and Peeta was not too far behind her with his family.

I stood up and waited in front of the closed silver doors. They creak and groan, and then sunlight is streaming through the crack that continues to grow, until I'm staring out at my District.

It's a windy day, and I keep having to tuck my hair back to keep it from being in my face. It's mostly the towns people standing there and cheering, but I don't care, cause I'm _home_ , and my grandma is standing right _there_ , and I've still got Peeta even if I have no other friends-

I rush forward and engulf my grandmother in a tight hug. I know she won't cry, because that's not like us, but I also know that doesn't mean she isn't happy to see me.

"Aces! I can't believe you actually won!" Peeta says as he rushes over, and I hug him too.

"Me neither."

"My family is back at the shop, furiously perfecting a dinner they want you and Rooba to come to." He said, pulling back to look at me.

"Oh, I don't want to impose-"

"You won't be. Promise. You're one of my more _respectable_ friends. Especially now. Mother would be ecstatic if you came over." He said. "How are you?"

"Physically, mentally, or emotionally?" I asked back, smiling slightly.

"All three."

I paused for a moment, contemplative. "Screwed up."

"Aren't we all?" He let go of my shoulders and took a step back so that I could have room to breathe again, but it didn't last long before I felt something crash into me, almost knocking me over. Something latched around my waist from the back, holding on tight.

I let out a strangled scream, not very loud, but existent all the same. I tried to keep my breathing in check as images flashed in front of my eyes from the games.

I looked down to see a little head of brown, curly hair tucked into my side.

"Thank you!" The girl cried, and that's when I realized who it was.

Posy Hawthorne.

"I- You're welcome." I said simply, not sure what else to say. I blushed as I felt everyone's eyes on us.

"I'd be dead if it wasn't for you!" She merely sobbed. My eyes grew larger as I pulled away from her, crouching down so I was eye level to her.

"That's not true. I have very high confidence that you could have won. You're a very smart girl, Posy. And you know how to live. That's all the matters, really."

"But I never would have been able to kill anybody!" She argued.

"That may be so. I thought the same thing before I went in, but I guess you really know what you're capable of until you have to find out." I said, not sure if it made any sense.

She snuggled and nodded, hugging me again. I hugged her back, happy that she was happy.

Someone cleared their throat and Posy pulled away, turning around to look.

"We should be going back home, Posy. Mom said not to take too long." Gale said, the same frown etched to his face. I bit my lip and stood up, very aware of this awkward situation.

"Come on, Aces. We should go too." My grandma said, placing her hand on my shoulder. I nodded. Turning, I began to walk with her and Peeta towards his bakery. I felt a hand land on my shoulder, and nearly jumped three feet in the air. Spinning around, I had to crane my neck back to look at who it was. It was Gale.

He coughed awkwardly before speaking. "Thanks. My family is grateful. My mother said to tell you that we owe you." He said gruffly. I'm sure my face was burning red.

"O-Oh. You all don't have to do that. It was really no... problem at all. I wasn't expecting anything in return." I stuttered, feeling stupid.

He wore a scowl on his face like he usually did when in close proximity to a Townie, and I felt as if I should be cowering in my shoes. But why should I? Had I not just won The Hunger Games?

So I held my ground.

"That's considered rude in the Seam." He said, as if I had made fun of them in some way.

"I am not trying to be rude. Merely trying to help my district in which ways I can. And if that means volunteering for a small twelve year old in a reaping, then so be it." I said, crossing my arms.

Had winning given me an immortality complex?

It's highly plausible.

He scowled at me for a few more moments before huffing. "Fine."

He turned on his foot and began to stalk back towards Posy, who smiled at waved happily at me. I forced a smile and waved back.

 _What an odd day this had turned out to be._


	10. Chapter 10

My breath was coming in puffs as I ran down the streets towards the butchers shop. The air was nightclub which made my hair frizz out. I tried to push it back, but that didn't work.

I threw the door open and ran inside, grabbing up my apron.

"I'm sorry, Gran. I didn't sleep much last night, and I didn't hear my alarm go off-" I said breathily, but she cut me off.

"Aces! What are you doing here? Go back home."

"W-What? Why?" I stammered.

"Because now it's not important for us both to work. I'm not sure if you should be working here just yet anyways. It's too soon." She said, wiping her hands on her own apron.

"Gran, I'm fine. I want to work: it will keep my mind from wandering." I said.

"From wandering to killing people and blood and death? Aces, you'll be cutting up slabs of meat with lots of blood. I said no, and it's final." She said. I looked at her for a moment before huffing and hanging my apron back up.

"Fine." I walked back out of the shop and down the road towards the bakery.

I pushed the door open and walked over to where Rye stood behind the counter.

"Hey, Victor! How's it feel to be famous?" He joked easily like he always has. I shrugged.

"Quite boring, actually. I'm not allowed to work at the shop anymore, which is bull." I said, crossing my arms.

"Well somebody's in a pissy mood." Peeta said, coming out from the kitchen.

"I just wanted to work. To get my mind to relax, and Gran won't even let me stay in the shop!" That wasn't entirely true, but I knew she didn't really want me there all day.

Peeta shrugged. "I mean, you did just come back from a bloody game, so I could see why she wouldn't want to traumatize you even more."

"Ugh, not you too! I'm literally going out my mind at home. There's nothing to keep my mind from going places it really shouldn't go."

"Are you finally admitting your secret feelings for me, Aces?" Rye Asked. I rolled my eyes.

"That's just gross, you're like my brother."

"You wanna work in the back with Wheat and I?" Peeta asked.

"That would be wonderful, but won't your mum get upset?"

He shrugged. "Not as long as it's you and she doesn't have to pay you."

I laughed without humor. "True."

I went into the back with Peeta, and he instructed me to knead the bread. So I did, and within a few minutes my arms were covered in dough from my elbows down.

Rye came in a few minutes later, saying it was his break time so if the bell rang for the door one of us would have to get it.

We nodded and continued with our jobs: me kneading, Peeta frosting, and Wheat doing whatever the hell it is that Wheat does.

And as luck should have it the door chimed for probably the first time that day, other than when I came in. Tuesday's where always their slowest.

"Not it!" Peeta And Wheat called in usion.

"Really guys? I don't even work here!" I said, but I was laughing and walked out front anyways. I stepped behind the counter and grabbed one of the hand towels to wipe off my hands.

"How can I help you on this very fine day?" I said cheerily, before looking up and inwardly hating the boys.

As luck would have it, it was Gale.

He seemed shocked too, and it took him a moment to say what types of bread he wanted.

"It's usually just four squirrels." He said as I bagged them.

I nodded and handed him the bag and took from him the string of squirrels. Working in a butchers shop had made me pretty numb to this kind of stuff, but maybe my Gran was right.

"Have a nice day." I said to him, before turning towards the kitchen. "Peeta! What do I do with squirrel coinage?"

"What?" He asked, walking out before accessing the situation.

"Oh. Hello, Gale. Aces, just put those in the fridge." He said.

"You got it, boss." I said before doing as he had instructed.

"Aces!" Wheat called from the kitchen. I popped my head in the doorway.

"What's up?" I asked.

"Tell Peeta That his cookies are burning and to get his ass back in here." I walked back out front towards the counter.

"Peeta, your brother says that your cookies are burning and that you need to 'get your ass back in there'." I said his eyes widened comically and he farted around me and pushed open the swinging door into the kitchen.

Gale coughed awkwardly before thanking me for the bread and exiting quickly.

I sighed and leaned my elbow on the counter while propping up my chin on my hand.

How has my life become this?


	11. 11

_Gale coughed awkwardly before thanking me for the bread and exiting quickly._

 _I sighed and leaned my elbow on the counter while propping up my chin on my hand._

 _How has my life become this?_

I groaned and rolled over in my bed, the blankets tangling around my legs even more. I looked out the window, squinting as the early morning sunlight hit my eyes.

Rubbing them, I looked over at the clock

It was only 7:25.

I stared up at the ceiling, wondering if it was possible that I could sleep a little longer. Even just five more minutes...

A loud knock reverberated from downstairs and I cursed all of humanity.

I stood up and grabbed one of my sweaters, pulling my arms through the sleeves and throwing my bedroom door open.

Even though it was 7 on a Saturday and now I had monthly Victor's checks coming in, Grandma was already at work in the shop.

"Who the hell is it?" I yelled, looking through the peep-hole. Blonde hair, rosy cheeks, blue eyes.

Peeta fucking Mellark.

I threw the door open and glared at him.

"Good morning my red headed friend!" He said cheerfully, pushing around me. He brought in the cold with him, and I tightened my sweater around me as I closed the door.

It had almost been six months since I came out of the arena. You know what that means.

Victory tour. Yay.

"Peeta, you do know what time it is, right?" I asked.

"Yup! It's 7:27! Perfect time for fresh bread from the Mellark Bakery." He said, plopping a loaf on the counter. I groaned and sat down on one of the swivel bar stools.

"I'm not hungry."

"You have to eat."

"No I don't."

"You'll die."

"That's what they all said when I volunteered."

This has happened every day for the past three months now. Every morning the argument is a little different. This is the first time it's gone in this direction. And by 'in this direction' I mean towards the Games.

I don't like talking about them. But sometimes it's almost nice to joke about them. Makes them seem like less of a nightmare.

Peeta just looked at me oddly, not saying anything. I must have taken it too far.

Sighing internally, I reached for the loaf of bread and tore a hunk off. I ate it all before looking back at my friend.

"There. Are you happy?" I asked. He smiled, his whole face lighting up.

"Very much so, yes. Now- go get showered and changed. We're going to go have some fun. God knows you need it." He said, coming around the side of the island and forcing me up and out of my seat.

"Where are we going?"

"Wherever the wind takes us." He said. "Although, I think you need new shoes."

Thgthgthgthgthg

"There." I said to myself, looking in the mirror.

I had bags under my eyes, proof of my sleepless nights, and my skin looked paler than usual. If I was being honest, I hadn't gone outside in about a month. It was getting too cold and it reminded me of the arena.

My usually ratty and untameable hair was pulled back in a long french braid, the water from my shower keeping it from frizzing out. Even my freckles looked a little in need of sun.

Maybe it was a good thing Peeta was forcing me to go outside today. I looked down at my feet.

I _did_ need new shoes.

"Are you almost ready?" Peeta asked through the door. I nodded before I realized that he couldn't see me. So I just opened the door and stepped out.

"Okay, let's go!" I followed him down the stairs and stopped at the coat closet. I opened the door and pulled out my heavy parka like jacket I had bought from the Hob a while back. I wasn't going to go out in the cold without a thick coat.

I put that on and then wound my scarf around my neck before putting on a hat and then my earmuffs, and finally my gloves.

"Crap." I said, my voice muffled by the scarf. "I forgot to zip my coat."

Peeta rolled his eyes and laughed before helping my with the zipper. Gloves and zippers don't really go together.

When that was done, I was finally ready.

Peeta opened the door and motioned for me to go first. I walked out and down the steps, mentally cursing District Twelve and how cold it could get.

We left Vicotr's Village and walked towards town. There were a lot of kids running around and playing in the snow that had fallen the night before. About halfway to town, a little Seam girl ran by, nearly knocking Peeta over. I laughed and steadied him, before leaning down to talk to the girl.

"Careful, Girly." I said, smiling at her. "You never know what you'll run into. Here, you look cold." I took off my hat and put it on her head. She grinned up at me, her two front teeth missing, before running off again she seemed to think about what I had said, and instead speed walked after her friends.

"Well aren't you just the town saint." Peeta teased me.

"What can I say? I have a soft spot for kids. I always wished I could have had a little sister or even a brother."

"Trust me, you don't want a brother."

"I don't think I want kids either now. Not after being in the games. It seems... almost selfish. To bring another kid into this, only for them to possibly be reaped."

Peeta didn't say anything back, only looked solemnly on up ahead.

We finally reached the shoe shop not too long after that. I pushed the door open and held it for Peeta before letting it fall shut. The bell dinged again after it closed, and the owner rushed out from the back.

"Miss Smith! What can I get for you?" He asked.

"She needs a new pair of black flats and some boots." Peeta said, not allowing me to speak. I frowned over at him.

"I have vocal chords, Peeta." I said after the guy rushed off to find some shoes.

"Yes, well, I know you. You would justget some stupid tennis shoes or whatever, and you need boots."

"And the flats?"

"Are pretty!"

"Are you sure you're not queer?" I asked him.

"Here. Try these ones." I was handed some shoes and sat down on one of the chairs.

I took off my too tight boots and slipped my feet into the new ones I had been handed. They were black on the outside, but the inside was made of red plaid material. The sole was nice and thick, which helped in our district where there was usually glass or bits of wood and rock all over the place.

Next I tried on the little shiny black flats. I tightened the strap that went over the top of my foot and stood up.

"What do you think?" I asked, showing Peeta. They had a little bit of a heel, no more than an inch, but I liked them.

"I think they look nice." He said. I nodded and turned back to the shoe maker.

"I'll take them both."

He gave me a price and I handed him a handful of coins from my bag.

When we left I was wearing the new boots and carrying my old ones in the bag with the flats.

"Now what? Can I go home? I think that's enough interaction for me." I said.

Peeta sighed. "I guess. Why don't we go back to the bakery first? Maybe we could have some cookies and milk."

"I guess that sounds good." I said, and we switched our path so that we were walking towards the bakery.

"So don't worry about my mother. She's been going on and on and on about you for the past few weeks, saying that there's still redemption for you, even if you said you liked a Seam boy. She'll probably say something to you." He warned me. I laughed.

"As long as she doesn't try to set us up again, I'm fine."

"God, I don't think I will ever be so embarrassed again in my life. That was horrible."

"The worst part of that was she thought we already were dating."

"True. Did you know-" and then two things happened very fast. Something flew by my face, missing my nose by a few short centimeters, and crashed into the shop window next to me. The window shattered into a million little shards, and I yelled, holding my arms up to protect my face. Next, somebody started screaming bloody murder from inside the shop.

I dropped to my knees, locking my arms around my head to protect it from any other shrapnel. My breath was heavy and I felt as if the world was pushing down on me.

"Aces! Aces!" Peeta said, reaching out with his hand. He touched my shoulder and that's when I lost it.

I started screaming, trying to shake off his hand.

"Don't touch me! Don't touch me, don't touch me!"

"Aces, calm down! It's okay-"

I screamed and screamed and screamed. I'm pretty sure if the glass hadn't already been broken, it would be now. People were still walking and running all around me, and everyone of them was an enemy. Somebody grabbed my arm and tried to pick me up.

I acted purely on instinct, reaching out and grabbing a piece of glass before swinging out at whoever had grabbed me.

I will not die I will not die I will not die.

"Kid! Calm down! I'm not going to hurt you!"

Haymitch.

And I had been ready to stab him.

His grip on my elbow is almost painful, but it helps me focus so I don't slip back into the crazy. Instead, I just brake down into tears.

"Shh, Aces, it's okay. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have made you come outside." Peeta says.

"Come on, Kid. Let's get you home." Haymitch and Peeta helps me stand up and walk on either side of me as we head towards my house.

"You're bleeding." Peeta said, taking his sleeve and dabbing at my cheek.

"Oops. It's probably from my hand..." I said, looking down at my hand that I had grabbed the glass with. Blood was dripping off of my fingertips and staining the snow beneath me as we walked. There was a little trail behind us.

"Aces!" Someone yells from up the street, and my head snaps up.

It's Posy, and guess who's not far behind.

Gale.

"Aces! Are you okay? You're bleeding!" Posy says in her innocent little child's voice.

"Er..."

"She's okay. Some kid kicked a soccer ball into a shop window and she fell in the glass." Peeta said. "We're taking her home to get her bandaged up."

"Do you know _how_ to do that, though?" She asked, and for some reason I laughed. It must have been the way she said it and the face she made.

"Don't worry. I'm sure Peeta can't mess it up anymore than it already is." I told her.

"Katniss' mom is good at injuries. You should go to her." Posy said. I tuned and smirked at Peeta.

"Thanks, Posy, but I'm sure we'll be fine-"

"You really should go to her. Your knees look pretty bad." Gale said suddenly, and I was so shocked it was a good thing Peeta was holding me up. I frowned at him and looked down at my knees.

I really wish I hadn't.

There were pieces of glass sticking out of my skin, and my jeans were torn and bloody.

"O-okay." I said, almost falling over. Peeta gave me a worried look before leading us towards the Seam.

"I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay. I'm okay." I said to myself.

"Are you sure? You don't look okay." Posy said.

"I _will_ be okay. I _will_ be okay." I said instead. She giggled.

She skipped along side of us, saying she would show us which house was Mrs. Everdeen's.

My head was starting to hurt, and I wondered if it was from blood loss, and could I really have bled that much? Well, my shins _were_ sticky with blood and my coat sleeve was thoroughly stained as well.

"- and so I told her that it was practically treason to say that she liked some other district's victor more than one of our own, especially since you had saved my life." Posy finished her story of one of the girls in her class.

"Aces?" She asked, but her voice sounded kind of funny. As if she was trying to talk to me from the other side of a wall.

"... Yes...?" I replied. My eyelids felt heavy.

"Aces?" She said again. Ad the world was tipping and everything was skidding and my feet slid out from underneath me, I was falling, falling, falling...

And then it was dark.


	12. 12

My head ached and pounded as I tried to open my eyes. They seemed almost glued shut, and when I finally got them open everything was much too bright. I groaned and looked around. _Where...?_

"Aces! You're awake! Thank goodness, you've been out for about three hours." Someone said next to me. I sat up and saw it was Posy.

Putting a hand to my head, I said, "'Out?'"

She nodded. "You passed out when we got here."

"Got where? Why did I pass out?" I asked. She frowned.

"Don't you remember?"

"Remember what? Did something happen?"

"Aces, you kind of... lost it. Some kid kicked a soccer ball into a shop window and it broke. You cut up your knees and hand..."

"Peeta?" I asked, frowning at my blonde friend. "When did you get here? Where _is_ Here?"

"You're at the Everdeen's' house, Aces. We came here because Mrs. Everdeen would do a better job of patching you up than Haymitch or I could."

"Haymitch is here?" I asked. Peeta shook his head.

"No, he went home a little while ago. Said to come get him when you woke up."

"Then why are you here?" I slurred.

"Prim went to go get him."

"Oh ok... the world is spinning... Oh my God, as I drunk?"

Somebody laughed and I turned to look at who it was. Stupid Gale.

"Why are you laughing at me?" I said, my words still slurry.

"You're not drunk, dear. It's the medication I gave you for the blood loss and pain."

"Uh-oh." I said, looking at Mrs. Everdeen.

"What?" Peeta asked.

"What?" I said back.

"Hmm. Maybe I gave her too much."

"Too much what? Did I drink again?"

"Again?" Peeta said. "What do you mean, _again?!"_

My eyes widened. "Nooooothiiiiiing."

Gale snorted and I turned and glared at him. "Just keep laughing, see what happens."

"Oh really? What are you going to do?"

"Peeta." I said, turning to my only friend.

"...yes?" He asked carefully.

"You know you're my best friend, right?"

He nodded and looked at me suspiciously.

"Am I your best friend?"

"Yes?"

"I don't believe you."

"What? Aces, are you feeling okay-"

"Hit him for me."

"Are you kidding?"

"No. I can't feel my legs from my knees down. I can't get up, hit him."

"Er..."

"I gave her too much." Mrs. Everdeen said suddenly, leaving the room.

"Too much what?"

Peeta face palmed.

Thgthgthgthgthg

"Hey Kid. How are you feeling?" Haymitch asked as he came over and sat in the chair next to me. I had my back propped up on the arm rest of the couch, and my legs out straight in front of me.

"I feel funny."

"I gave her too much pain medicine. She must be lighter than I thought." Mrs. Everdeen said.

"I'm not small." I said.

"No one said that." Peeta said, sighing.

"Said what?"

"Has this been going on since she woke up?" Haymitch asked.

"Has what been goin on?"

"I'll take that as a yes."

"Yes what? Is Grandma here?"

"No, why?"

"Oh. Usually people only says yes when Grandma's here."

"Is there anything we can do to make her a little less... loopy?" Peeta asked.

"I'm not loopy. I'm straight. You know who I think is loopy?"

"This isn't going to end well. Who is loopy?" Peeta said.

"Evangeline White."

"Who?" Gale asked.

"She's this..." Peeta started, but didn't know how to explain the bi- errrr.

"She's That Stupid blonde who is loopy. She's always staring at Jenny, and it ain't the good kind of staring."

"Oh no."

"Did you know she asked me out once?" I said.

"Oh she did?" Haymitch said.

"And how did that go?" Gale asked, cracking up.

"I think I slapped her, not sure."

"Actually, you flat out punched her in the nose and told her, and I quote, 'why don't you go mess with your stupid clique, you queer little-' Er, child ears." Peeta said.

"I did that?" I asked. He nodded.

"Wow. I'm cooler than I thought."

"You're awesome! I can't believe you won the games!" Prim said.

"Between you and me, I can't either." I said.

"Here here." Gale said.

"Where?" I asked.

Peeta sighed.

"What?"

"Ok, Aces I think it's time we took you home. You're loosing it."

"Loosing what?"

"Your mind." Haymitch said.

"Ohhhhhh. No I lost that years ago."

Prim laughed.

"What? What's so funny? Did I say something stupid again?"

"Yes. Yes you did."

"Gale, be nice." Posy chastised.

I scoffed. "I don't even think Santa could make Gale nice."

"Who?" Everyone besides Peeta and Haymitch said.

"Who?" I said.

"Okay. That's it. Thank you, Mrs. Everdeen. How much do we owe you?" Peeta said.

"Don't worry about it." She said.

"Are we leaving?" I asked.

"Yes. You need a nap."

"But- ok." Peeta grabbed my coat and pulled out a handful of coins, before handing them to Prim.

"There. That's for the medicine and such. Come on, Aces."

"Where are we going? Are we going to Narnia?"

"You're going to the insane asylum." Peeta said.

When I look back, I realize he must have been joking.

"No! I don't wanna go baaaaack! You can't make meeeeee!" I stepped off te last stair and almost face planted.

"Aces." Peeta groaned. "You've never been to one."

I gasped. "I haven't?! My life is a lie!"


	13. 13

I groaned as I woke up, feeling as if I had been just harshly all over the head. My legs felt like heavy glass, as if when I tried to stand on them they would shatter and I would crumple to the floor.

"How are you feeling?" The voice was light and smooth.

"Grandma?" I groaned, turning my head to look at her.

She pushed my damp hair away from my forehead.

"You kept having nightmares."

"I'm better now." I said, sitting up. "But everything hurts. What happened?"

"You were walking with Peeta and a kid kicked a ball into a shop window. The breaking glass must have thrown you into a flashback or something, because you kind of lost it after that."

"Oh no." I groaned. "I probably looked like a psycho."

Her hand rested on my cheek, the calluses familiar and comforting. "Don't worry dear. They understand. It's hard coming back from soemthing like that. I'm so proud."

"Thanks Gran..." There was a knock on the door downstairs, and she shifted on her spot next to me on the bed to look down the hall.

"Who is it?"

She shrugged. "Probably the little Hawthorne girl. She came over a bit earlier to check on you."

"Oh." I said. Posy was too sweet.

Gran got up and left the room to go get the door, and I fell back onto the bed.

As I lay there and stared at the ceiling, I traced the crack that ran up one wall and up onto the ceiling over my head. It looked almost like a tiny river, as if I were looking at it from very far away.

There was the sound of footsteps and I turned to see Posy running in.

"Aces! You're awake!"

"Awake, alive, and aching." I said as she stood next to my bed. There was a little blonde girl behind her. Primrose.

"We brought you flowers." Primrose said.

I smiled brightly at her. "Thank you." Gran came in then and said,

"Here. I'll go put them in some water." Primrose handed the flowers to her and I watched as she left again.

"Does it hurt a lot?" Posy asked.

"Does what hurt?" I asked.

She shrugged. "Anything."

I shook my head. "No, not really. Just sore. I'll be fine in a few hours." I said.

"My mom told me to say she was sorry about the medicine." Primrose said. Her cheeks were red and her smile was even brighter than her golden hair.

"What?" I asked.

"Oh, you don't remember?" Posy asked.

"She accidentally gave you too much, she does that sometimes when she can't guess a patient's weight exactly. It kind of made you..." She trailed off, looking for the word.

"Loopy?" Posy offered, giggling.

"Oh no." I groaned. "What did I say?"

"Well, at one point you tried to convince Peeta to hit Gale for you." Primrose said, still grinning as if it was a very humorous subject.

I covered my face with my hands. "I'm mortified."

"Don't be. It was funny. I think we all needed a dose of laughter."

"Well, it came at great expense." I said, looking at the two girls.

"Shouldn't You two be in school?" I asked.

"It's already three, Aces." Posy said, giggling again.

"Oh. Gosh, I slept all day. I haven't done that since-" I stopped, not even bothering to try and force the words out.

The air seemed thick and solemn now, and I wished to take my words back.

"So, Primrose, what else did I say?" I asked, changing the subject smoothly.

"Oh, just call me Prim. Everyone does."

I smiled. "Ok. I s'pose this would be when I would say, 'and you can just call me this,' but I don't have any possible nicknames. My name is already short." I joked.

"I like your name. It's so pretty." Posy said almost wistfully. I laughed.

"It's an odd name, I'll give you that. But I think you guys have way prettier names than me. Pretty names fornpretty flowers and for pretty girls." I said.

Gran always said I would make a great mom or teacher one day, and it was little comments like that that made me see why.

Prim grinned at me. "Now you sound like Katniss."

"Gosh, that must be a world record. Do I get a prize?" I asked. Posy laughed.

"Do you three want some lunch?" Gran asked, poking her head in my room.

I groaned. "Yes, please."

She nodded and left again. She's always moving, always doing something.

I got up and motioned for the girls to follow me as I left the room.

I could smell the beef that Grandma was cooking before I even started going down the stairs.

"So, hows school been?" I asked.

"Well, the same as it always has been." Prim said.

"Yeah. We learn about coal. We learn about rebellion. We learn about Hunger Games. It's boring now. Not that it was ever fun before, but..." Posy said, shrugging.

"Gosh, you'd think they'd mix it up a little bit, but they never do. Gran always says I should become a teacher- that I've got the patience for it and the schooling already." I joked.

Prim smiled. "You'd make a great teacher."

"Thanks, kiddo." I turned into the kitchen after stepping off the stairs and sat down at the table.

"We should probably get home-" Posy started, but I waved my hand.

"Eat first. We have too much here to eat on our own. And then I can walk you two home." I said.

"Are you sure?"

"Positive." I said, motioning for them to sit down as Gran came over with bowls of stew. "I need a walk anyways."

"That's not what I meant-" Posy started, but I pulled her towards the table.

"Thank you, it's very kind of you." Prim said as she sat down too.

We ate quickly so that there would still be plenty of light to walk by. The whole while we ate we talked and laughed, for once having a stress-free night. It was nice not to be alone. This was already my least part of day even before the Games, and now it was even worse.

Gran still wouldn't let me work, and she worked all day. So did Peeta. I would help him in the bakery when I could, but sometimes it was hard to even get down the stairs.

"Be careful!" Gran yelled after us as we walked out the door. I sling my scarf tightly around my neck and shoulders and shouted back an Okay.

The air was crisp and fresh-with the tinge of coal as always- as we walked out of the victor's village and towards the Seam.

"What are you doing for your talent for the Victory Tour?" Prim asked.

"Oh." I said. "Crap. I forgot to find a talent..."

Post laughed. "You say that like you have to buy one."

"I practically do. I mean, all I've ever done is go to school and cut up animals. I never _needed_ a talent." I said.

"Maybe Katniss could teach you to sing!" Prim said. "Well..."

"I don't think she likes anyone outside of you and Gale that much, Prim." I said with a smile. "And I would ask Peeta to teach me to draw, but we've tried that before."

"What happened?" Posy asked.

"I managed to set the paint on fire."

The girls stopped and looked at me, each expression more confused than the other's.

"Yeah. Peeta says it's my _only_ talent. To set things on fire. I don't think the Capitol would be very amused." I said, and we starated walking again. I could see the Seam by now, and the snow was becoming greyer as we continued.

"Well, I'm sure you'll find soemthing." Prim said.

"Thanks, Prim."


	14. 14

"And we're on in five... four... three... two..."

Effie stepped back and opened the door, motioning me out. I plastered a smile on my face as I walked down the steps of my house and heard the applause through the speakers. The camera moved back slowly and I followed along the path we had planned.

"Aces!" Ceaser's voice rang out in the silent Victors' Village. "How wonderful to see you! You look like you're doing swell!"

I gave a fake laugh. "Not as good as I was in the captitol! I'm counting down the days until I'm there!" I lied.

"As are all of us! We've certainly missed you! Now, can you give us a little sneak peak of the talent you'll be doing?"

I smiled. "Afraid not, Ceaser. You'll just have to wait and see."

"Well, there you have it, folks! Aces Smith, District Twelve Victor!" More applause and then the camera shut down and the night was silent again. My shoulders slumped at the thought of having to go back.

I still wasn't even _sure_ what talent I would be doing yet.

"Amazing! Now, inside before you catch cold." Effie squealed, pushing me back up the steps. "Out in fifteen! Busy schedule!"

I sighed and sat down in the living room.

I thought of what talents I might have. Really, the only thing I was good at was knife work-

I shot up off the couch, realizing what I could use for my talent.

"Effie!" I called, and she came around the corner.

"Yes dear?"

"I need your help with something."

Gapkgapkgapkgapkgapk

I stood on the stage, my ears burning from having the attention of the whole district on me. It was the same as the last eight districts.

I said my speach that Effie wrote for me, feeling empty and disgusted at my words that held no feeling. But I let out all the feelings when I sat down in front of the piano. My only talent besides carving meat.

My fingers danced across the ivory keys, portraying the sadness and guilt I felt; expressing my sorrows for the families that lost. And not just in these last games- all the games. Every last game from the previous seventy-three years.

And when I was done, I stood up and bowed to the crowd before walking back off stage.

Only three districts left, and then the party in the capital.

And then I could go home.

Until the next games came.

Agkpagkpagkpagkp

Posy sighed as she sat in front of the tv.

"She's so good."

I didn't say anything in reply, but my mother hummed her agreement.

I didn't understand their interest in the music anymore. Sure, the first two districts her playing had been... lurching. Really the only way to explain it. And even though every district got a different song, I had never been one for music.

And less so for music played by a towny girl.

But it was required to watch the victory tour, so here I sat, silently listening to the music come through the speakers.

"Maybe when Aces gets back, she can teach me!" Posy said excitedly. I frowned.

"Why would you want her to teach you? Besides, we don't have a piano."

"No," Posy countered, "but _Aces_ does. And then I could go visit her more!" My frown deepened, but my mother put a hand on my shoulder before I could reply.

"Let Posy be. You know she's not going to listen either way, and at least Aces is a caring girl." Turning to Posy she said, "I think that's a wonderful idea."

Posy smiled brightly and turned back to the tv.

"It sounds so sad."

I scoffed. "At least she knows that much of hopelessness."

"Gale!" My mother chided with a scowl.

"Don't be mean." Posy pouted. "I like Aces, I don't see why you don't."

I stared at her incredulously. "She's a _townie."_

Posy rolled her eyes. "Well, she saved a _Seam girl._ And besides, she's technically a victor now. Not a Townie."

"I'm not sure if that's any better." I grumbled.

My mother turned to Posy with a secretive smile. "I think he _does_ like her, but he just doesn't want to admit it to himself yet. He's too stubborn."

"Mother." I warned. She shrugged.

"I'm only stating the truth as I see it."

The conversation ended there, soon followed by the etheral piano music.

Her hair shined like motlen copper as she bowed to crowd again, the twin pigtails spilling over her shoulders.

 _I do_ not _like a Townie._

Pkgapkgapkgapkgapkga

The television continued to play in the corner of the fromt counter, Aces' piano muaic fillin the bakery. I had stopped watching it long ago, merely listening to it, but now even the sounds of it had faded into silence as I traded with her. With Katniss.

Her skin was paler than it usualy was, due to the winter overcast, but still a beautiful shade of coffee.

"Thank you." I said with a bright smile as she handed me the squirrels and I passed her the bag of bread.

She merely nodded in response and left, stepping back out into the light snow.

I sighed and leaned against the counter. Why did I have to be so damned cowardly?

Maybe if... If we both survived this next reaping, I would tell her. I would.

I made a mental note to talk to Aces as soon as she got back- to get her help. If I was going to be able to win Katniss over, I would need another woman's help.


	15. 15

I refuse to acknowledge the last two weeks happened. At all. I never went through all the districts, and I definitely didn't shake hands with President Snow.

Nope. It never happened.

Gran finally let me work again in the shop today. Which was releaving, considering Mrs. Mellark had been giving me that 'Hello, future daughter-in-law' look again lately. So, in short, I tried not to go to the bakery as frequently.

Which is a pain. I've grown used to Peeta's company.

I'm in the back, carefully cleaning the meat knives and getting ready to slice up the meat for today when the bell rings. My head jerks up but I'm at a funny angle and can't see who it is. So I grab a towel and wipe my hands, pushing open the swingy door with my hip.

"Hello, how may I help you?" I ask before I even see who it is. As soon as I do, my hands clam up. I swallow thickly and put on my 'I'm totally fine' smile.

It's Katniss. And... Gale.

Oh well.

Katniss steps up to the counter as if she doesn't pick up on the awkward vibes. Maybe she doesn't; after all, I'm almost a hundred percent sure that ahe doesn't have an incling that Peeta has been massively in love with her since the first day of school.

"We shot a deer. How much can we get for the meat?"

Thank God for Katniss Everdeen and her bluntness. It's like a breath of fresh air in a world where people only know how to beat the bush. That's why my grimace turns into a true smile.

"Well, how much meat? Do you want me to go get Rooba? I don't know how much she usually does..." I trailed off, peering around the corner to see if she was coming down yet.

"She usually just does a few coins a pound." I nodded as she continued. "I think there's about fifteen pounds." I smiled.

"Alright. I'll grab the money. Do you have the deer with you?"

She shook her head but it was Gale who answered.

"It's at Katniss' house. Her mother is skinning it."

I nod again. "Alright, well, we can send someone to pick it up or you can bring it back and I'll get the money together."

"We can bring it back. Thank you." Katniss said flatly before turning and leaving, Gale right behind her.

I let my hand drop from where I had raised it in farewell and sighed.

A few coins per pound? Before I had never really thought of how little that was, but now... I shook my head and popped open the register. There was plenty of coins in here now that I was getting Victor salaries.

I returned to the back, getting ready to prepare the meat to sell. It was like second nature, clean this, move that, chop it all.

I hadn't even given it a second thought until the cleaver thumped through the meat, spraying blood.

I stopped, my entire body freezing over. My cheek was warm, and it tickled as something ran down my chin and neck. I slowly reached a hand up, touching my fingers to my face. They came away red and sticky. Blood.

And then I was in the town square again, a knife in my hand, anothers blood on my face.

I dropped the cleaver with a chocked scream and staggered back. It was as if my throat had just stopped responding. I couldn't get air in or sounds out. I backed up all the way into the worktable behind me, knocking things over.

"Aces?" Gran called down the stairs, but the sound didn't register right in my head. Everything was too bright, too loud, too hot or cold or suffocating. There were footsteps snd the click of a phone, more jumbled words, and then someone was grabbing my arm and I didn't want to die, no, I can't die-

My throat finally opened up and I was screaming, screaming, screaming and I couldn't stop no matter how much I wanted to. I didn't even know if I wanted to; if I wanted to be okay and calm down.

In my panic I scrambled for the cleaver again, my movements stiff and choppy.

"Aces!"

Voices are decieving, don't listen, don't trust, dont, don't, don't-

Don't.

 **GPOV**

I kept quiet as Katniss and I carefully caried the deer back to the butchers shop. We took most of the back ways as to lessen the chances of getting caught. Katniss didn't speak either, but she never spoke that much anyways, and so it was silent. Until we got within sight of the shop.

I could hear faint screaming and the sound of crashing. I slowed to a stop with a frown, causing Katniss to stop as well she turned towards me.

"Come on."

"I don't think that's a good idea, Catnip. Don't you hear the screaming?" My frown deepened. "I knew this was a bad idea. She's bot mentally stable."

Katniss sighed. "But the money is the best we'll get. And besides, we're strong enough to take care of ourselves. And I hate to say this, but she might... She might need help if she's having another relapse or whatever it is."

I sighed but didn't say anything else. Katniss took that as an okay and continued to the shop.

There was no one in the front, but that was because they were all in the back. What had been muffled screams before had quickly turned into shrieks.

"Damnit, boy, grab her arms!" Somebody yelled as Katniss and I rounded the corner.

There was blood on the floor along with a forgotten cleaver. There was a very worried looking Rooba standing next to the door I had just walked through, and Abernathy, and Mellark.

And a very messed up looking Aces Smith.

She was thrashing in Mellark's arms as he tried to get her to stop hitting him.

"Calm down! Aces, calm down!" He yelled.

Abernathy looked over at Katniss and I.

"If you're not here to help, stand out of the way." He said gruffly.

There was a loud 'pop!' and a grunt, and then Mellark and Smith hit the floor. His nose was bleeding and her elbow was jabbed into his ribs as she continued to squirm.

"Let go! Let go! Let go!" She yelled.

Abernathy crouched down in front of her.

"Aces, calm down. It's okay now. You're in Tweleve. You're not in the games-"

"Lies! Shut up! You're lying! I won't die, I won't! Don't! Don't! Stop! Let go!" Her words blended into shrieks again.

"What do we do?" Mellark asked.

"Get her to stop screaming, first. Cover her mouth." Abernathy said. I raised an eyebrow. Yes, that sounds like a _wonderful_ plan.

And Mellark, being the stupid Townie he is, followed Abernathy's orders.

That only seemed to add fuel to the fire, however, as Aces' eyes widened and her muffled shrieks grew in pitch. And now he only had one arm to restrain both of hers as she thrashed more and more.

She got one arm free, her nails ripping at the hand over her mouth. When that proved futile, she started hitting Mellark in the face. He was going to be all kinds of black and blue tomorrow. I couldn't help but grin a bit at that.

"Hawthorne. Either help or get your smug ass out." Abernathy grunted as he tried to grab Smith's kicking feet.

Mellark cursed as blood ran from between his fingers.

"Aces! It's me; stop biting!"

I looked sideways at Katniss, who now also looked worried. Why? Why did I keep getting dragged into this shit?

I sighed and carefully approached.

"Mellark, let go. You're not strong enough to get her to stop thrashing. Hawthorne, when he lets go, grab her." I had no chance to argue as Mellark swore again and let go. His hand was dripping blood from a deep gash.

It was my turn to curse as Smith shot up and lunged for the dropped cleaver. _Damn, she's fast._ I caught her and picked her up so she couldn't get the knife. Her feet kicked at my knees and at anyone that got too close. Mellark got a kick to the stomach and the face before he was able to grab both her ankles. Smith continued to scream and struggle, causing me to almost drop her a few times. How did she get so damn strong?

"Aces!" Abernathy yelled. "Snap out of it! Do you hear me? Stop!"

"Aces, please. You're gunna get hurt." Mellark said. The frigging softie.

"Damnit!" I huffed as her head connected with my chin.

"Aces! Stop! You're hurting everyone!" Mellark said again.

Her small hands latched onto my arms, trying to pry them off. For such a tiny Townie, she sure was putting up a fight. No wonder she won.

Katniss stepped up, grabbing her wrists and carefully but forcefully pulling them away.

"Aces. Stop." She said. "You're not dying. We're trying to help." And surprisingly, Smith calmed a little. I looked at Katniss in surprise.

"See, Aces? It's alright. Calm down. Please." Mellark said. She stopped trying to kick the shit out of him but wasn't done trying to get free entirely. Her voice had given out, a crack every now and then the only sound.

"Are you alright now?" Absrnathy asked gruffly. Smith nodded slowly. There was blood all over her face.

I let go and she crumpled before regaining her ballance. Rooba was there instantly, making soothing noises as she led Smith out.

I looked to Abernathy and arched my brow.

"What the hell?"

"She had a PTSD moment from trying to chop the pig up." He motioned to the slab of meat and cleaver. "We couldn't get her to calm down." Mellark nodded and straightened, holding his hand as more blood dripped on the floor.

"Thanks for the help." He said before following Smith and the butcher.

I looked to Katniss and we left as well. We waited by the counter with the deer carcass.

What a day.


	16. 16

Sometimes, embarrassing shit happens. It's just a part of life. Everyone goes through it at some point.

I was just hoping my embarrassing moment wouldn't have a repeat button.

When I woke up after my little 'relapse' as Gran likes to call it, I was upstairs in my old room. And when I say 'woke up' I don't mean 'and my eyes fluttered open as I looked around in confusion.' I mean 'the room finally came into focus and I realized I wasn't in Wonderland.'

I didn't _actually_ fall asleep. Does that make sense?

It's been getting harder and harder to sleep. Sometimes the nightmares don't come right away, but I'll jolt awake out of habit. And then I'll feel guilty for being able to fall asleep without having a nightmare. So then of course I won't go back to bed, and then I'm like a walking corpse the next day, anyway.

I don't know what I prefer; the nightmares or the all-nighters.

I know I don't like either of them at all.

That's a start. I think.

I spent the rest of that day sitting in the corner I had found myself in with my arms wrapped aroud my knees which in turn were pressed tight enough into my chest that breathing was a miracle. At one point the thought crossed my mind thag maybe I was _okay_ with not breathing. That maybe if I stopped- stopped breathing, stopped sleeping, stopped _living-_ everything would be okay.

I mean, of course it would be okay for _me._ I'd be _dead._ Unless, of course, Heaven and Hell and God and the Devil are real. Then I'm screwed beyond the nightmares.

No, I don't want to stop.

Gran brought up some stew around six and set it next to me on the floor. I'm pretty sure she said something to me, but I had retreated into my head just oast that line of 'functioning in the real world.'

I didn't touch the stew.

I didn't sleep that night, either.

You know what happens after the Victory Tour?

The next Hunger Games.

 **PPOV**

I propped my chin on my hand. It was almost closing time, and the bakery was dead empty. The only sounds were the humming of the ovens I would have to shut down before I left, and my breathing. My nose wasn't broken, thank goodness, but it sure did hurt like it. My whole face was black and blue already. My right eye ached something awful, and every now and then it would start wattering.

The look on my mother's face when I had walked back in had been... The normal, I suppose. The anger and satisfaction something I had seen almost everyday of my life. 'Serves you right.' She had said angrily. 'For running off like that in the middle of your shift.'

Explaining to her that I had run off to help Aces had only slightly brightened her mood.

I wasn't sure anymore if I should still talk to Aces after my shift. My plan this morning was to head to the butchers as soon as I was done turning off the ovens, to hopefully get some advice on how to even _speak_ to Katniss. But after her meltdown, I wasn't sure that was a good idea. Meltdown. Is that the right word?

Thinking about that had brought me right back to thinking about Katniss. Shocker. I felt a little guilty sometimes, a little creepy, because of how often I thought of her. Her hair, her eyes, her voice.

It had been Katniss who had gotten Aces to calm down. I couldn't even believe that her _or_ Hawthorne would step in. But if they hadn't, who knew what would have happened. My grip on her arms had already been slipping, and Lord knows Abernathy wouldn't have been able to stop her from grabbing that cleaver. And then what? Was she so far away from the moment that she would have turned on us?

I kicked the thought out violently. Aces was kind. She would have stopped.

I hope.

And, as it usually goes, my thoughts went to the looming Games. If I survive this next reaping... I'll tell her. No matter if I get Aces help or whether or not it helps.

Because I'm in love with Katniss Everdeen, and that's the only thing I know will never change.

 **GPOV**

The first thing I did when I got home was fond Posy. I told her I didn't want her to be going over and talking to Smith anymore. Or talking to her at all. Or even going near her. She was confused, of course, but I didn't give her a reason why. I didn't want to scare Posy, and she didn't need to know the reason to be able to follow my rules.

Smith was crazy. Like, actual crazy. Her first meltdown hadn't been that bad, I've seen plenty of people pass out at the sight of blood. And plenty of people have been funny when given too much pain medicine.

But today... That had been an actual malfunction. She was messed up, from the games or whatever, and she wasn't safe. So I told Posy to stay away. I didn't want my sister getting hurt.

Tiny bruises rimmed my forearms and there were small knicks that I rinsed out from earlier. At least Katniss hadn't gotten hurt.

How had she done that? How had she calmed down Smith? Everytime I thought I knew all there was to Katniss, something new always popped up. It was unsettling. And slightly annoying. When would she stop changing? And when would the world stop trying to set me up with Smith?

 **KPOV**

Today had not been what I expected. At all. I'm not sure yet if that's a bad thing.

 ** _Sooooo, the 74th Hunger Games are fast approaching. It will probably be mostly Aces POV, some Gale I'm sure, and a few Peeta. There may be one or two Katniss, but since we've already read the books, we know what was going on with her. So it will pretty much be a very similar story like. But now, since Aces has also become a victor, there are_ two _female victors that could be tributes again from District Tweleve. Comment and give me your oppinion on what you would like to happen for the Quarter Quell. If you still want Katniss to go in, if her name should be called but Aces volunteers, if Aces name is called but_ Katniss _volunteers... I'm open to suggestions!_**


	17. Author’s Note Sorry Important!

**Author's note: sorry, it's not an update. But it is important! This leads to _further updates,_ so the more responses I get the better picture I can get, and therefore the quicker I can crank out these chaps. A few people have commented and said that I _shouldn't_ keep the 74th games as is. I didn't really think about changing them at all, and honestly hadn't realized that I could go that route. So everyone who says to change the games, how so? I'm completely open for ideas. More minds are better than one! **


	18. 17

_Four months to the 74th Hunger games._

Why does time seem to pass faster when all I want it to do is... stop?

I've heard people say that at certain moments time _does_ stop. So why won't it stop for me? At least a day. That's all I ask.

A day where I'm not a victor, where I don't get pitying looks. A day where I'm not a 'Townie,' where I don't get glares from more than half of Twelve.

I want a day.

Maybe I'm cursed. That sure would explain some things. But I have to remind myself, it was _my_ fault I went into the Games; I volunteered.

And I don't regret a single second of it.

Maybe I'm _lucky._ I went into the Games with all the odds stacked against me, and I won. Maybe time won't stop for me, because if it does, I might never be able to get it going again. I could get stuck, and then what? Allow the world to continue on and leave me behind?

I won't be left behind.

 _Three months to the 74th Hunger Games._

I've had three more 'episodes,' as Haymitch and Gran call them. The first was from a nightmare- I woke up and immediately went to the kitchen and started hackingg everything up, apparently. The second was on my birthday, when Peeta surprised me and gave me a hug from behind. I hadn't even heard him come in. I flipped him over my shoulder and stomped on his chest. He felt really bad, but I told him it was my fault for not paying attention.

The third was... there was a minor explosion in the mines. It sounded like a canon.

Each one they had to hold me down until I calmed down. The last time, Peeta had to get a sedation shot from the pharmacy.

My neck still hurts whenever I think about it.

Thankfully, no one else had witnessed them.

Oh but believe me, they've all heard about them.

 _Two months to the 74th Hunger Games._

I wake up everynight from a nightmare, cold and covered in sweat. _If_ I even sleep.

I zone out a lot. I think it worries Gran and Peeta.

Peeta asked me for _girl advice._ For Katniss. I tried to help, but I don't know her well enough to be able to help too much.

Every time I wake up from a nightmare it takes a while to remember where I am. Most nights I'm so disoriented that the sweat on me feels like blood. Like Rebekah's blood.

I dream about her a lot. Mostly that moment by the fountain, when I stuck the knife in her throat.

I wish the Games would stop. I don't see what would be so bad about that. If I was lucky, you think they would.

And this brings me all the way back to my first thought- maybe I _am_ cursed.

 _One month to the 74th Hunger Games._

Time sure does fly when all you want it to do is stop.

I asked Peeta how many times his name was in. He was my only friend- despite the others from school who tried to be my friend now. I hadn't ever heard a word from them before I got back as a victor.

I would ask Gale, or maybe Katniss, but I don't think that would go well at all.

Peeta's answer makes me feel better. Only 16. He's almost safe. Two more years, and I won't have to worry about him anymore.

This is the last year Gale's name will be in.

I try not to think about him too much, it does no good.

Thinking at all does no good.

So maybe I'll stop thinking. I'll just keep going, like the clock.


	19. 18

A knock sounded at the door, the third time this morning and it was only eight thirty.

"Aces, _please._ You have to go. You need to wake up. I'm going to call Haymitch if you don't get up."

 _As if_ he's _up yet._

"Okay, Gran. I'm getting ready."

"That's what you said five minutes ago. And five minutes before that."

I sighed and rolled out of bed. I shuffled to the door and opened it. "I'm up this time."

Her face was pale and she looked worried.

I couldn't take the worry and pity, so I closed it again.

I shuffled to my closet and pulled out the nicest dress I had, a rose gold knee-length dress with straps. My movements were slow and jerky, as if I was only moving because of strings someone was controlling. I felt detached. Maybe that was the only way I could get through this.

I stumbled and fell as my vision was filled with blood. This has been happening all morning; flashbacks and images of faceless people being brutally murdered by my own hands.

I picked myself up and left my room, grasping the railing on the stairs tightly.

"Are you ready?" Gran asked, holding out my black flats to me. I took them numbly and slipped them on, moving silently through the shop and out the door.

The streets were quiet, people only speaking in whispers if they spoke at all. I moved through them all like a ghost, someone who didn't belong. I got a few odd looks- probably from the fact that I almost never stayed in my victors house- that I barely noticed as I made my way with the crowd towards the city center.

I was right- Haymitch wasn't here yet. I sat next to the Mayor and Effie, waiting for Haymitch. My bet was he wouldn't show up until it was time for the train to leave.

Effie looked over at me. "Do you have any idea of when Haymitch will get here?" She asked as the mayor stood and gave his speech. I shrugged and continued to look out at the crowd. I couldn't meet the eyes of anyone.

Effie stood and I stood too. She switched places with the mayor and he came and stood next to me as a video from the Capitol played. I ignored it. I only tuned in when Effie strutted over to the girls bowl and reached a bejeweled hand in.

She pulled the paper out with a flourish and walked back to the microphone. My stomach was churning horribly as I waited.

"Katniss Everdeen."

The breath left me with all of my thoughts. I had hoped- I had selfishly prayed- it would be someone I didn't know someone I could let die without feeling as bad as I would already.

What was I going to do?

She had to come home. For Peeta. For Gale...

I gritted my teeth and decided I would do everything I could to ring her home just as Effie said the male tribute's name.

"Peeta Mellark."

 _No._ No, no, no. This couldn't- _I_ couldn't-

I couldn't help it; I started crying. The tears flowed and flowed and wouldn't stop. I sat down shakily in my chair and cried and hiccoughed as Peeta walked up the steps and shook hands with Katniss.

I only cried harder.

He didn't look at me as he was led past and towards the room he would say goodbye to his family in.

As soon as I could stop crying, I followed after. Haymitch was there, who knows where he came from or when, but I didn't care. The tears started flowing again and he tucked me awkwardly into his arms as I cried.

I heard yelling and then someone was grabbing my shoulder, pulling me back and turning me around.

Gale.

He looked furious as he gripped my shoulders painfully and glared at me.

"She comes home. Do you understand? Bring Katniss back."

I nodded dumbly, barely able to make my head move or keep it up.

That only seemed to make him angrier, and he shook my harshly.

"Hey! Are you listening to me?"

Haymitch stepped in, pushing against Gale's chest. "Leave her be-"

"I'm fine, Haymitch." I said quietly. He looked at me for a moment before stepping back. I looked down at my shoes, the shoes Peeta had helped me pick out, and swallowed. "I'll bring her back. I promise." I said, looking back up at Gale.

"You better, Smith."

"Or what?" Haymitch said gruffly, pulling him away. "What are you going to do, Hawthorne?"

"Haymitch, please, stop yelling." I said, shuffling back outside. I sat down in my chair again and placed my head in my hands.

 _I can't do this, I can't do this, I can't-_

"Hey, it's alright girlie. You don't have to listen to him. He's not your boss. If you wanna get that boy out, that's what we'll do-"

I shook my head and looked up at him, all of my stupid hope from that morning gone. "You don't understand. We can't. It has to be Katniss that comes home."

Haymitch frowned. "Don't pick her because your head is muddled with stupid love or whatever, girlie."

"That's not it. It's... I- It's not my place to tell you."

Haymitch sighed and looked out over the emptying square. "So the girl comes home." I nodded.

"Good. If that stupid ass Townie comes back, and Katniss doesn't, You'll wish you hadn't won your games, either." Gale said as he passed us and walked down the stairs. I watched as he walked back to his family, as Posy latched onto him and started crying.

Poor girl.

"Aces. It's time to go." Haymitch said softly, helping me to stand up. He didn't let go of my arm, and I was thankful because I wasn't sure I could stand on my own.

I walked onto the train next to Peeta, knowing I wouldn't be walking off with him at my side.


	20. 19

I stopped just inside the door as it slid closed behind me, the _click_ sounding like the toll of a death bell.

I watched as Katniss and Peeta took in the interior of the train car. I wonder if that's the expression I had last year?

Haymitch of course was MIA. Katniss and Peeta sat down awkwardly and sat in silence. Peeta looked over at me, sorry clear in his eyes.

"Aces, come sit down?" I slowly blinked and said nothing back.

"Is she okay?" Katniss asked him, and I was sure I was the only one who noticed the panicked blush on his ears.

"Heh, maybe?" He replied, rubbing his neck.

I started crying again.

"Aces!" Peeta exclaimed, stumbling when he quickly stood up. Katniss looked surprised as she sat there.

"It's okay! Don't cry... please." Peeta put his hands on my shoulders and bent to look me in the eye. "Stop crying, it's alright, you're okay-"

"Stop!" I sobbed. "It's not okaaaaaay!" I hiccoughed and threw my head back, tears flowing down my face.

"Aces please, you don't need to cry!" He tried again but it didn't work. "Don't make me!" He threatened.

"M-make you wh-what?" I hiccoughed.

"Don't make me hug you!" He said, his voice wobbling no matter how he tried to stay strong. I sniffled and glared at him.

"Don't you _d-dare!"_ I warned, still crying.

He sighed and pursed his mouth. "You've left me no choice. Aces, stop crying or I'll hug you until you do."

"You w-wouldn't."

"I would, and you know it."

 _Oh, Peeta._ I thought. _Always there to help me. But not for long..._

I started crying harder, causing him to wrap his arms tightly around me.

I squeaked and squirmed, trying to escape, but damnit this boy was too strong.

"N-no! Let go of meeee!" I wailed. "I hate hugs!"

And then I could have sworn that Katniss _laughed._ But she covered it with a cough and I wasn't sure anymore.

"Not until you stop crying!" Peeta said as if he hadn't also heard the Maybe laugh. I _know_ he did, because no matter what's going on, his every sense is trained on that oblivious girl.

"F-fine!" I said, pouting and trying to stop crying. Unfortunately that also meant I had to hold my breath, which made my face really red.

"Hey! I said stop crying, not stop _breathing!_ I swear, you're hopeless!"

I narrowed my eyes at him, challenging him to try anything. I knew I probably looked like an overgrown five year old with my tear stained, red cheeks puffed out as I held my breath and my challenging scowl, but I was beyond caring.

My best friend was going to die.

I groaned and sucked in some air just as Haymitch decided to grace us with his presence.

"Where's the alcohol?" He grumbled. I frowned at him.

"Have you finally decided to come and give us some advice?" Peeta said angrily. I was a bit surprised at his tone of voice.

Haymitch laughed. "You want some advice? Stay alive."

"W-what? How is _that_ supposed to help?"

Haymitch grabbed some more liquor and left.

Katniss grumbled something to herself that I didn't catch, but could guess along the lines.

I let Peeta lead to me to one of the chairs before curling into a ball as deep in the cusions as I could get.

"What about you? Do you have any advice for us?" She asked. I gulped and met her gaze.

"Well..." I thought back to my games, trying not to hyperventilate. "I don't know how I won. Don't trust what you see? Ohhh, I'm so bad at this!" I wailed, crying again.

Katniss looked very uncomfortable, and a little guilty.

"It's alright, Aces." Peeta murmured, looking out the window at the blurs of color. I saw his fingers twitch and cried harder at the thought of him never getting to paint it.

I was a mess, and I needed to pull myself together.

"D-don't... Don't go to the Cornicopia." I mumbled, trying hard to think of anything. I had to help them, I had to get Katniss home.

For Gale...

What if I wasn't able to save her? What if I came home without _either_ of them? What would I do? What would _Gale_ do? Everyone knows he's in love with Katniss- I've always known I had no chance- what would he do if I failed to keep her alive?

"You have to... to make people like you." By now the sobs were gone, and only a few tears rolled silently down my face. I stared numbly off into space and Peeta rubbed circles at the base of my neck to try and calm me down. "That's how you get sponsors. And sponsors get you... Stuff."

Katniss frowned. "And if I can't get them to like me?"

"Well, that's for Haymitch and I to muddle through, I guess."

"You'll be fine, Katniss." Peeta offered quietly. I gagged.

"Why do you always have to be so optimistic? It makes me wanna throw up. Or cry... Yeah, cry in the corner of my too big closet until I can't cry anymore, and then I still won't leave and I'll die of dehydration. Good plan, Aces." I said, starting off by talking to Peeta before having a full blown conversation with myself.

Much to my surprise, and Peeta's, Katniss let out a strangled laugh. Short, but a laugh. "No wonder you like Gale." She said simply. I blinked at her.

"Wha?" I slurred. Crying always made me feel drunk.

Not that I would know what that feels like...

"You're both, you know... Pessimistic and introverted?" Katniss tried, cringing.

Peeta laughed. "You should have seen her up until a few years ago. This one could talk your ear off about how one day we'd all rule the world from a throne of butterflies."

I scoffed and feebly hit his arm. "I did _not."_

"Did _too."_ He shot back.

I looked at Katniss and said, "Don't listen to him. He's clearly deranged. I think it might be shock." I raised my eyebrows at her conspiratorially. "Shooock-ah." I giggled.

Katniss blinked at me in confusion and looked back at Peeta, who blushed again.

"She's a handful."

"Tell me about it." He muttered shyly. "She's my usually so... Drunk?"

I gasped. "Did you just call me drunk?"

He paled and put his hands up in surrender. "No. No I did not. No one's calling you drunk, I don't- I don't know what you're talking about." He stammered.

I hummed and turned to Katniss again. "He's a terrible liar. I don't know how he's kept-" I was cut off as Peeta lunges over the arm rests and put his hand over my mouth.

"Wah or ouu doi? Wah oy goi se da ouu akule lie ku ant da cays." *what are you doing? Was only going to say that you actually like to paint the cakes.*

Katniss looked confused and Peeta laughed awkwardly as he stood up, dragging me out of the chair.

"I think she needs to sleep off the tears. I'm going to make sure she gets to bed." With another awkward laugh, he dragged me from the room.

 **KPOV**

I watched Peeta drag Aces from the room in confusion. I don't think I had ever seen him move so fast, outside of a wrestling match that is, as when he lunged at Aces just now.

What had he thought she was going to say that was so bad?

I sighed and decided that some sleep didn't sound so bad. I could use all the sleep I could get before the games.

 **Awe, oblivious Katniss is the best. Sad, but cute and smol bean like. Am I right?**

 **Review, comment, or favorite, they all result in a heart attack of happiness!**

 **Also, I'll be in Germany for nineteen days starting the first of August, and I probably won't have any internet so it'll be a while before I can update anything.**

 **Sorry guys!**


	21. 20

I didn't leave my room until we got to the Capital.

I could hear the cheers of the citizens through the train walls as we pulled up in the station. I walked like a zombie to the dinning car, just in time to catch Haymitch handing Katniss a butter knife and whispering something to her.

"Aces!" Peeta said happily when he saw me. "Are you alright?"

I didn't answer him, instead I looked towards the doors that would open as soon as the train stopped. I didn't want to be here, not again. I wanted to go _home._ I wanted Peeta to go home, and Katniss, and Haymitch.

"I don't want to." I said quietly. I missed the look between Peeta and Haymitch before Peeta walked over and wrapped his arms around me.

"I'm sorry, Aces." But we walked out onto the platform anyways.

"Aces!" People screamed, waving and smiling at me. My breathing came heavily and Peeta kept his arm tight around my shoulders, helping me through the crowds.

But then he had to leave to go get made up for the opening ceremony. I stood there with Haymitch, face blank and chest tight.

Watching Peeta and Katniss come down the runway, waving at screaming Capitolists, tugged at my insides in a painful way. The fire that lit up along their previously black dress wear gleamed in my eyes, but I didn't see it, couldn't see it. Couldn't see anything until the night before they had to go in, until I was about to lose my best friend.

I snapped back to life that night at dinner.

Had I really sunk into myself that badly that I missed everything?

"What happened?" I asked. The entire table was terse and quiet, no one making eye contact with anyone else.

"Well, you see- Lover Boy here decided to announce his love for Katniss during his interview." Haymitch answered, waving his fork around as he spoke around a mouthful of food.

"Wha- you did?" I asked, looking to a sheepish looking Peeta. Not getting anything but a blush from him, I turned to look at Katniss who didn't look any happier. She was aggressively stabbing at her food as she ate, refusing to look anywhere near his direction.

"I'm sorry guys. I totally- I mean... I've been a terrible mentor." I said, putting my face in my hands. And I had _promised_ Gale I would get her out, I promised _Peeta-_

"Aces, it's alright. We understand." Peeta soothed. "No one really expects you to be functioning so soon after... and back here no less- it's cru-"

"Shh!" I hushed him. "No!"

He blanched as he seems to remember the ears everywhere and ducked his head, going back to pushing his food around.

"Just... Make sure you guys eat enough tonight. And... try to sleep by any means possible. You'll need it." I paused to take a steadying breath. This shouldn't be so hard. Or maybe it shouldn't be so easy. "Haymitch and I will be working here on the inside to help you. So just... do cool shit, I guess."

When I had advised them to 'do cool shit,' I hadn't meant, go team up with the careers or drop a nest of tracker jackers on them. Honestly.

But the people in the Capitol were eating it up- more money from sponsors was pouring in than before, and after that nasty burn Katniss got, it had definitely been needed.

I returned to the control room with the other mentors and weaved my way through the busy room to Haymitch.

"How's it looking?" I asked. He grunted and motioned to the screen he was standing in front of. I watched as nothing happened, the screen still focused on the same muddy bank spot that Peeta had slowly melted into not two days ago.

"You stay here and watch over these two; I have to go make some suggestions." I nodded and took his spot, watching as he left the room. Turning back to the Games, I watched Katniss hobble her way around.

"Be careful, please." I urged to the screen, knowing no one could hear me.


	22. 21

I sat and watched the screens for a while. It was dark in the arena before Haymitch got back. Katniss had only been up in her tree for maybe half an hour when the speakers turned on.

I slowly stood up and walked closer to the monitors, listening to Seneca make his announcement that there could be two victors, as long as they were from the same district.

I wheezed and clutched at my chest. "W-what?"

"I had to do something. I'm not letting either of these kids die." Haymitch said as he stopped beside me.

"Y-you did this? How?"

He shrugged and responded gruffly, "I made some convincing points."

I blinked at him and decided not to push. Because did it really matter? He had just given Peeta and Katniss the best shot at getting out alive.

Now all Katniss had to do was find Peeta...

And find him she did, a day later. Was it a day? It could have been more. I wasn't even sure what day it was out of the arena, much less in it. We all watched with baited breath either way as Katniss made her way closer and closer to Peeta.

When she had reached the river bank a few yards down stream, I scrambled for a piece of paper.

"What are you doing?" Haymitch asked.

"Helping her."

Putting the note in a small tin she sent it out to Katniss.

KPAGKPAGKPAG

 **KPOV**

I started as I heard the whistling tune signifying a package being sent down. Looking up, I carefully grabbed the parachute heading to me.

 _Watch your step._

 _\- A.S._

That was all. Just a note. I had expected the coded messages from Haymitch, but I had thought Aces would do a better job of being clear.

Either way, I kept on heading upstream, taking extra care to look around the ground at my feet. Had it meant there was a trap around here?

When I came across a large, oddly shaped rock, I stopped. There was something wrong with it, that just didn't look right.

So, pulling off my bow and loading an arrow into it, I whispered,

"Peeta?"

A couple seconds later proved my suspicions correct as his eyes fluttered open, the dried mud cracking around his face.

"Katniss...?" He slurred.

"Oh my god!" I dropped my bow and knelt next to him, wiping some of the mud off his face.

 **APOV**

Haymitch and I breathed out a joint sigh of relief as Katniss rolled Peeta into the shallow part of the river, washing him up. When she got to his leg I worried my lip, waiting to see how bad it was.

And it was _bad._ Really bad. I looked to Haymitch with the question clear in my eyes.

"We're just going to have to hope the Capitol eats up their relationship."

"But... They don't have one."

"The Capitol doesn't know that." Haymitch said slyly.


End file.
